hey I'm not your buddy, guy!

you could drive from Minnesota to Kansas with your family and a cat in the car, see how much fun you have.

Or we could tie our shoes together, our tennis shoes, and we could throw them over telephone wires. Because I see that everywhere and it seems like people would have fun doing that. Like, how hard can you throw?

"Roger, I had a very disturbing dream last night. In this dream I found myself making love to a strange man. Only I'm having trouble you see, because he's old… and dying… and he smells bad, and I find him repulsive. But then he tells me that everything is erotic, that everything is sexual. You know what I mean? He…

I'm the Only Hell (My Mama Ever Raised)

Agreed about the hilariousness of the cold open. Pam and Ryan being into it made it funny and silly and awesome. Here's to more MSPC>more Pam in a business suit>more of Jenna Fischer's fantastic rack.

They've mentioned suppliers. I don't know how stuff like that works in business, just saying.

bang bang, Maxwell's silver hammer came down upon his head

"Like a wolf, thank you."

The worst part of any of those commercials is the way they're all like "this is you." Like those old ones with the game-killers? I've never had game, and thus no one to have killed it, so piss off. I'll take my women plump and low-standard-ed-ed-ed, thank you very much.

"What do we think of guys who change styles for every occasion, whether it be a white-tie dinner or a triple-half-caf-skim latte?"

Falconry
That was all I saw in the episode but it was enough. Great, great line reading there.

you meant "I thought it was Lady, the lead singer."

so Jorge, if you were scared of horror movies at the library in the 80's, does that mean you were scared of Lon Chaney's Phantom? Jeckyll & Hyde? Frankenstein? Shit, that's public domain. Kid stuff, I declare!

I'd like a tiddy bear

I don't get what the big deal is. The Beethoven-style acoustical hearing horn is still very much in fashion, and gets me lots of attention and validation at parties. It's my Mystery Method Peacocking item.

I thought for the longest time that since t-shirts often depict one character in various forms that each form was a separate character. Silly, huh?

Wait, Billy Bob Thornton, the drummer/singer/songwriter for the Boxmasters is also in movies? Like Bonnie Prince Billy?

I totally agree, Mr. Awesome. When Bob Dylan did it, it was original, and intentional, and sometimes funny. Dylan was reacting to stupid questions, ill-informed journalists trying to get a piece of him, etc. Billy Bob is pissed off and bitter that his sub-par music can't get any attention without his Hollywood…

Muppets in general
forget Oscar. The tangible corporeality of those damned furry critters freaked me the shit out of me on multiple occasions. Notably including: