You can't even keep your story straight! Columbo would have a field day with you.

For me it was Rusty Bucket Bay and that fan-Jiggy. You know. That one. Although growing up pretty much everything after Bubblegloop Swamp caused severe rage for the first couple of attempts. Rusty Bucket Bay was just the one that nearly broke me. Click Clock Wood was a relative doddle after that level.

"So, Mr Dualidean, can you tell us about a time you had to overcome a particularly difficult challenge? What steps did you ta-"
"Mu. Illusion of Time. Twenty years it took me. But I did it."
"…"
"Beat those vampire pricks too. Eventually."
"…you're hired."

Mu can suck my balls, frankly - it's such a huge difficulty spike from the relatively sedate opening dungeons. It took me HOURS to get through the dungeon itself, and to find myself confronted with those nocturnal twats - and that time limit adding even more pressure - at the end of it was just the icing on a stupidly…

Christ, I love Illusion Of Time (because I'm from the UK and we're not allowed to have properly-named things. See also: The Avengers Assemble). That was one of the first games I ever owned for the SNES, and I remember how ridiculously amazing/weird it was. I don't think I've ever managed to get over the horror of my…

I still haven't played Nuts & Bolts, mostly out of sheer spite that Microsoft and Rare would gut my childhood so viscerally (based on the gameplay trailers and the GOD-AWFUL visual design).

When it comes to being able to play a game through muscle memory, my hands go into their own rhythm every time I play Banjo Kazooie. I blitzed through it about four or five times when I was growing up and when I repurchased it for X-Box 360 last year it was like I'd never done anything else in my life. Blitzed through…

Considering that GoT tends to have a hidden musical appearance each season (e.g. Sigur Ros during the Purple Wedding), I would give anything to have Tina Turner crop up in S5 to belt out one of Westeros' two hit songs.

Hannibal
"I'm full of myself."

I would dig the Tex-Mex theme just to hear us all wax lyrical on the elegaic speeches, nerve-wracking tension and viscerally stunning imagery of opening episode "Spicy Wedges".

Smoking out of the hole in his cheek, I assume. And Hannibal bringing the munchies.

I'd settle for a spinoff show with the two of them high as balls, laying in bed and laughing about how weird/damaged/murdery their friends are.

I'd be surprised if they did kill off Jack and I really hope they don't - Laurence Fishburne has been quietly excellent this season. Admittedly, he's not been called on to do much for the majority of the season beyond glower at Will and demand either confessions or results off him depending on how incarcerated he is.…

That's a really fascinating way of looking at it. Personally I find the gore a big draw, mostly due to the sense of purpose behind it. It's not just viewer titillation (although undoubtedly there's an element of that) - it tends to characterise the killers really effectively through their methodology. Even before Will…

I'm unable to play much this weekend, due to my girlfriend visiting after finishing uni for the year and therefore foregoing my laptop in favour of Hannibal and cuddling. However, I've had the joy of watching her start replaying Age Of Mythology. So that sort of counts, I suppose. It's like a live-action Let's Play…

While one or two episodes of the season have kind of turned me off - the first episode with the beast-suit guy was just too much on the side of pulpy for my tastes - I've REALLY loved this season as a whole. It's been nothing if not hugely ambitious, and last week's episode still ranks as one of the most grotesquely…

Ha, thanks. Just covering my ass in case the Internet Police come down and break me. I'll need to download it and watch it ASAP (haven't had the chance to yet because of reasons involving work and my balls in a vice).

But…but it has its own Wikipedia page and everything! http://en.wikipedia.org/wik…

Hmm, was it shown on E4? Or does this viewing involve…chicanery?

That's the finest description of TV mechanics I've heard. I can't wait to steal it and repurpose it as my own during show-based arguments in bars.