That last one was the first thing I thought of. I never really responded to Cornell's style of lyricism but that one stuck with me.

I swear, I kept waiting for that thing to start singing.

No Armageddon? I call bullshit.

There are two types of people: Those who like Labyrinth more and fucking liars.

I hope it's as visually stunning and functionally unwatchable as the original.

You don't know what know what those words mean either.

So he's not being a callous idiot who fails to grasp even the most basic details of the garbage he's spewing, he's merely suggesting that Cornell killed himself with contaminated tap water?

This seems like the kind of band that would have played at the Bronze.

So you legitimately think "Robin Carradine" is a person.

If that's a joke, you're not good at them.

I don't jump right to "Hey fuckstick, shove that phone up your ass, why don't you?" I ask nice. If they say no, I ask a little less nice. If they still say no, I get management. That usually clears up the problem.

That's cool. I swear a lot but I'm not pissed at you either.

I'm less talking about this specific instance (this guy is clearly psychotic) and more about the phenomenon of movie theater texters.

I get that. I'm not trying to single you out, but I see that line of reasoning everywhere ("This does not personally affect me, therefore it's not a real problem and everyone else should just get over it.") and it's really not helpful. This is an exceedingly minor example but it still shows a lack of empathy and a…

Good for you. Lots of people can't. Just because something doesn't personally bother you doesn't mean you can unilaterally declare it okay for everyone.

Good for everyone else in the theater, too.

I got no problem with him. It's just that his role is such an ersatz pastiche of an actual badass character that no one on earth could have made it work. The whole movie felt like a community college drama club got ahold of a bunch of leather jackets and decided that was all they needed to become Reservoir Dogs.

"Sometimes (most of the time, I'd argue) the only way to fix a problem is to make a bigger mess for a short amount of time."

It's such a bad movie that it temporarily made me think less of the actual good movies it was ripping off. I started thinking things like, "Tarantino-esque dialogue and plot structure really do kill momentum, don't they?" and "You know I never noticed this but John Woo-style gunfights are kinda silly, aren't they?"…

I was shown Boondocks Saints for the first and only time by a girl I'd just started dating. It was REALLY hard to keep my eyes on the prize when she asked me what I thought of it afterward.