Sadly, his communion ceremony involves snaking tentacles into every orifice to send communicative electrochemical signals directly to the brain.

When he wanted to hire a dwarf dressed as John-John to stand by the bed and salute the whole time… THAT was my dealbreaker.

"Ass-play bildungsroman" is my new favorite phrase. Thank you.

"Mmf… I'm tasting cumin… I'm tasting turmeric… it's gamy but not overpowering… and just a little bit of heat."

I dunno… most airports I've been to have clean bathrooms and lots of hot people.

" …a straight cisgender female grizzly Adams ."

… or were you debating RIGHT?

I would love to know what things your mom did that required lack of a paper trail.

We can vocally comment on Savage Love now?

… what was wrong with the title "Quantum of Solace"?

"'No, Dad - what about you? 'Damn you!'"

Oh, yeah! Mom asked me to go so my little brother wouldn't have to go alone. What I surprise that I loved it (possibly more than he did.)

I have never regretted my "LaRouche in 2000" neck tat.

Oh yeah - particularly because he was a cancer survivor, a lot of people invested hope and inspiration in him.

Christ, PeepingTorgo. I don't now how can you can watch movies on a regular screen like some brute animal.

I hate Humvees, but the Tumbler is awesome.

Oh - or a Batmobile. Anton Furst or Tumbler. They're road-legal, right?

I tend to like souvenirs that are practical and/or don't take up a lot of room.

I… I DO.

Well! I wanted to quit my job anyway - now I have the perfect reason. I'm SURE my girlfriend will understand..