My only experience with Canada was driving up to Vancouver one summer day and touristing for a few hours. Seemed quite pleasant. Everything I have heard about it since then sounds great as well. Surely there must be at least one thing wrong with Canada?

Eye of Newt Brunswick

Just one on vinyl so far. But a ton on CD.

I was attending a demo of a natural language device the other day, like Siri or Alexa. Everytime someone would ask it a question, it would give a short answer, followed by "Would you like to know more?" My computer/sci-fi friends and I spent most of the lecture biting our lips, trying not to laugh.

You kids come over here and get on my lawn!

I read the novel. I didn't think it was all that great. It didn't suck, but there was nothing special about it.

New records:
Zoinks! - Bad Move Space Cadet
The Bambi Molesters - Intensity!
The Kelley Deal 6000 - Go to the Sugar Altar

I'm 6'2" but more like 195-205. Almost all of the extra is in my chest and gut. Lifetime of the sugar jones, maybe.

I'm almost finished with I Wear the Black Hat by Chuck Klosterman. I don't think I would like him if I met him in person, but I like the relaxed easy flow of his written nonsense all the same. And there are definitely talking points and discussion vectors in his writing.

Teacher, teacher, can you teach me?

I suspect I would be ridiculed in Wisconsin because the only mustard I like is the wimpiest yellow kind. I can't stand honey mustard, dijon mustard, stone ground mustard, or any of the others. If it's not bright yellow and squeezed out of a bright yellow bottle, I don't want any on anything, thank you.

That game looks totally awesome. I swear I saw Samus doing sonic kicks like Guile from Street Fighter.

Anybody who claims to be remembering the 70s is remembering a fluid and biased version of the 70s that is specific to them (it has been scientifically proven that memories are constantly in flux, and the memory changes every time it is recalled). Media from the time are either calculated to be prurient or calculated…

There are times when it's okay to talk about your complicated feelings regarding Harry Potter movies. And then there's your professional writing career. Mixing the two is kinda gross.

Rape is an odd thing. You'd have to torture and threaten in quite cruel ways to get me to do it, and I'd still feel bad afterwards. While the only way to get Ted Bundy to stop was state-sponsored execution. It's the Brock Turners of the world, the "rape opportunists", that you really have to worry about.

There's a place near me called Twisted Root Burger Co that sells a product called "Treat Yo Self Fries". Skin-on shoestring fries topped with literally disgusting amounts of cheddar cheese, large coin-sized chunks of bacon, and (optional) jalapeños. Served with a side of ranch. So fucking good, but the health…

And the brown-skinned vegetables are bad. So racist!

I accept none of this. In a top ten list of potato products, In N Out fries should never rank higher than 4,657.

Much more likely that they regressed the variables and noticed a strong correlation between french fries and death, and then some hack reporter upgraded that to causation without reading the original journal article. By the time it gets to the AVClub, we're lucky that anyone even knows that it was originally published…

Oh, are we still pretending he was born in Hawaii? Come on, now, he's not even president anymore.