Is it possible that the Miami Metro police are even less competent after losing LaGuerta and the Morgans?

So Shaw is back to pretending to play hard to get with Root. "I miss you like I miss an intestinal parasite."

When I saw John Heard's face in the opening, I hoped for some Home Alone-style shenanigans. When they entered the vacationers' empty house, I wondered whether some slapstick was still possible. But that's when the darkness set in. "I'm afraid this is where I get off."

So the mom-to-be is a 34-year-old virgin? Talk about straining credulity.

Will some poor sap be cast as the father? Or will they mercifully find a creative way to circumvent needing male characters for this debacle?

…it’s hoped that hands could be replaced by fried chicken…

I hope that Letterman assures him that CBS is super-cool with exploiting the interns for fun and profit.

Just don't let him near the maidens at the faire.

I hear that Hodor is huge in Lithuania.

That is just wrong. Two month olds need to start out on wine and beer. Gin isn't appropriate until the first birthday. And no whiskey until they are able to walk to the liquor cabinet to pour it themselves.

These silly eggheads didn't even control for what "media" was on the screen. Obviously, the toddlers watching Breaking Bad and Game of Thrones would respond much better than the morons watching Honey Boo Boo. And you need to watch at least six straight hours of Pokemon before the calming effect even has a chance to…

So was "I am Spartacus" some sort of allegory related to the witch hunting?

The knocks of ages.

Imagine treating Helen Mirren as a Skylar. Heisenberg would have learned quickly what it really means to be the one who knocks.

American Horror Story is the miniseries anthology that retains a stale of actors…

Actually, in the initial series review, Todd VanDerWerff (based on the first four episodes) gave True Detective a B+.

So long as the pieces are arranged into a stunning tableaux. Bonus if it's discovered by a lumberjack.

DickHolster, if you mess with the beauty of the 70s technology, you kill the magic that is Shatner's "Rocket Man." Next, you'll be trying to ban the smoking.

Did they try building a Venn Diagram of orchestra lovers, classic Star Trek fans, and "Abrams" Star Trek fans? If they had, they may have realized that they picked the wrong films for this sort of thing.

So long as she's a hard-drinking, foul-mouthed, incompetent doctor (reduced to teaching a class for terminal patients), I'm sure Showtime will jump to pick it up.