mASSter card

I see you're also a fan of the "Alabama sinker"

Yes, but no debit cards

Don't knock it till you try it

Oh, yeah. Chips are bad too

Just shove a god damn credit card up my ass

That's a typo. They meant "Clam Rooms"

Fight your fears by staying here! Bring a shotgun.

gonna wear cargo shorts and a very unironic shirt

Good advice

There's an OUTSIDE space!?

That makes it sound like JJ Abrams is running a pyramid scheme…

But how!? Why!? What!?

Just watch any Godzilla knockoff movie and shake your TV really hard

I'm waiting for a movie in this "franchise" to finally connect everything together and explain itself… I mean, this is a JJ Abrams thing, so there's a good chance we'll never get any explanation at all

Aluminum also can fetch pretty good money, depending on the market. Not that I would know… I didn't spend an entire summer stealing aluminum siding from a pool company's storage lot or anything…

I thought he was giving away free scrap metal

The Avengers clearly don't watch the news

Ok, yeah I see what you're saying now.

I'm ok with this