Samuel Vimes. Knows his beat like the back of his hand, fights dirty but works clean, and he appreciates that it's not just about the law - there are rules.

Record it at night, play it back through the wall at breakfast time.

PID should just send his stalker on an away-mission. The red sweater will take care of the rest.

Slaughterhouse-Ten?
Followed by:
Mo' Big Dick
The Very Hung Caterpillar
Length And Sensibility
The Curious Incident Of The Dong In The Night-time
Around The World In Eighty Lays

I respect the precision with which you categorise your turgidity.

"Norm!"
"I think 'Abnorm' is closer to the mark, Cliff!"

Do we know who's on Agents of SHIELD-detail? Someone old enough, I hope, to appreciate the quasi-paternal inflections of Clark Gregg's arm-folding, but young enough that they look at the rest of the cast without wondering why a global intelligence/planetary defence network employs a bunch of goddamn teenagers.

If he can make The Transporter, in which he greases himself up to wrestle a bunch of henchmen, then survives underwater by kissing the very air from a dead man's lips, then nothing can threaten his sexuality.

That sentence is the reason spree-killings occur.

Due South did this exact story, when they changed the actor playing Ray. Turned out the "real" Ray had gone undercover with the mob, and this new guy was posing as Ray so his absence wouldn't be noted (it was not the most well-thought-out storyline). The "real" Ray did eventually come back - I forget what happened to…

Everyone knows about your crooked wang.

Is this the sequel to Ed TV we've all been waiting for ?

Now I'm genuinely confused - how else can you pronounce "issue"?

I'd get quite Muad'Dib we weren't.

You may enjoy (or you may very specifically not - it's always hard to tell, but that's where Chris Morris does his best work) Morris reporting the 9/11 attacks, trying to get information from correspondent Patrick O'Hanrahahanrahan who is in New York:
http://www.youtube.com/watc…

Schultz is most assuredly a provocateur - the man thinks grief is good, and has his main character constantly declare it so.

Have you got any clarkie-cat?

I don't care about the hat, I just want him to keep the facial hair.

"…a Dungeons and Dragons thing."
"Oh… Is this something to do with sex?"
"Ha! Far from it, Jen!"

@patagonianhorsesnake:disqus Not to take Hitler's side or anything, but nude is, in point of fact, the very best way to eat chocolate cake.
Though the reverse is not true. Eating chocolate cake is only the fourth-best thing to do while nude (after sex, bathing/swimming, and frolicing in a meadow).