The train fight with Doc Ock narrowly beats out the space plane rescue from Superman Returns (which, cartoonish Luthor notwithstanding, I quite like - to Hell with the lot o' yous!) as my favourite comic-book movie action scene.

"I didn't smash my wife!"
"I don't care."

HULK'S HOUSEMATE FORGET TO PUT TAB IN DISHWASHER LAST NIGHT, NOW HULK HAVE NO CLEAN BOWL FOR BREAKFAST. SCOURING SPONGE NOT GET BOWL CLEAN - HULK REGRET HOUSEMATE'S PREDILICTION FOR WEETABIX. HULK LEAVE BOWL TO SOAK, GET SANDWICH FROM GREGG'S ON WAY TO WORK.

Unless she's a Dickensian urchin, in which case every "H" is unsounded. (Except when saying the letter "H", when a previously non-existent "H" is sounded, turning it from "aitch" to "haitch".)

Cheryl's brother, in an attempt to intimidate her into adding her fortune to his own, commits a hostile takeover of ISIS. Cheryl has tantrums left and right, Malory now effectively has a boss and is horrified to find herself bonding with what are now her colleagues rather than her employees, and Pam plots against the…

More to the point, how do I apply for Dick Clark's now-vacant job position?
Don't you judge me - these are the Days of Austerity.

"Because Mr Incredible (well, Bomb Voyage actually) wrecked the previous railway."

I read it that without Eve around to be touted as the War Child, Saviour Of Mankind And Future Destroyer Of Vampires, humanity would be more likely to get off it's arse and take care of business. After all, it wasn't Adult Eve's intent to have baby-her die in the explosion when she sent Kirby, or all the other times…

Velvety, if we disregard what an adverb is.

Keith Mars, on the other hand, no longer has a planet, since Sarris destroyed it - neatly freeing him up to resume his sheriffly duties.

"I buffed them with Turtle Wax. The man down at Pep Boys says from now on the urine should just bead up and roll right off."

As with all Aardman, you'll need to get it on disc later and go through frame-by-frame to catch all the sight gags. And more movies should have Flight Of The Conchords on he soundtrack.

The main trouble with 2 is that they never actually do a Mission:Impossible sneaky mission. Everything they do is guns and explosions, which would normally be awesome, but for the fact hat super-sneaky "in, out, put the kettle on" spycraft is Mission: Impossible's USP.

Saturday afternoon, I saw The Pirates! In An Adventure With Scientists - good fun, with some cracking setpieces. A very different story to the book, though, to the point where almost the only common elements are pirates and Darwin.

I would pay good money to see a double of "P Is For Psycho" and "The President's Neck Is Missing"

The best bit of Hicks' Easter monologue?
The bizarre quasi-British accent that only comes out of American mouths, in which he says, "That's the story of Jesus!"

"Mr. Kim, we're Starfleet officers. Weird is part of the job."

He wants to Carter around town on a date, in the hope that she might Grant him access to Pierce her Bush with his Harding, and he'd Filmore like a Truman. He considered using deception, but the Roosevelt wrong. Now she's off with Peter, he has no-one, and he just Jackson his Johnson.

The Prickwick Papers
A Tale Of Ten Inches / A Tale Of Two Titties
Hardon Chuzzlewit (Jizzlewit? Jiggletits?)
Great Ejaculations
And of course, the ready-made Hard Times.

Wrap your hand in sellotape (sticky side out, of course) and paw at her dustiest areas. It works on sweaters and household pets; it should work on bridal gowns.