NO HOMERS!

NO FRELLING!

You'd better be good at making out.

I don't know what you have planned tonight, but count me out.

714 names? Better be more specific.

Review hated for the use of the supposed word "bromance."

The difference is that Bri doesn't disparage people who do eat meat, and doesn't say she hates all meat-based dishes.

Shut up, baby, I know it!

I don't think you know what "arbitrary" means.

Porn fetish food!

Crushed by her very own hands. It's that kind of personal touch that matters.

Season 2: This Cookbook Does Not Exist by Jennifer Behm (seriously, no book by her)

I don't think it was Krissi herself that ruined the season, but rather whoever decided to turn the show into a bitch-fest reality show more like Big Brother than a cooking competition. Krissi certainly doesn't help, but I think she's more a symptom of that than the cause.

Jesus is your DVR?

(Shows depicted may not actually be gay.)

How much did Joel enjoy getting to say “This master…baited me” on live television, on a scale of one to Jeff Winger?

Who wants to watch small children compete like that?

“By now, your new improved love life should have you flinging woo like nobody's business. So to you, Mr. And Mrs. Erotic American, I bid good day.”

Ben Starr is at Burning Man for the next month,

The structure of this show pisses me off - the winner of a freaking Quickfire not only gets immunity, but then doesn't have to cook, and gets to screw with the competitors?