[gets popcorn]

The A.V. Club
What are you doing on the computer? 
Masturbating.

I have a ball of twine I can donate.

It takes a lot of balls to not say that.

No, that would be entirely newsworthy. The "news" these days reports on such things as royal births and celebrity scandals. Scratch that, not just celebrity scandals. They even report on celebrity pregnancies, or even celebrities finding new partners to fuck.

We've all seen VD, it's mostly a question of how effective the antibiotics were.

No, emoticons never work.

I'm sorry, I was just thinking of swollen clitorises.

Hang on. If you had a "lady boner" for her, wouldn't that make you a lesbian, rather than straight?

“…  turning it from something unremarkable into something remarkable and newsworthy via bad reporting.”

Am I the only one who thinks that DNA Mad Scientist wasn't a very good episode?

The only thing I'm high on is love. Love for my son and daughters. Yes, a little LSD is all I need.

I spent a similarly ridiculous amount of money on VHS tapes of Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman. Don't judge.

I love the fact that he actually has a sig stating that he has no sig.

@avclub-da2cfbc3287da0f4f985aa7350b8831b:disqus

Erik Adams didn't even use his own keyboard!

Writers… working? What kind of fevered dream is this?

“Ohhh, I've wasted my life…”

@avclub-518aedbf95e34c72567f82fd1ad92f76:disqus

Erik Adams: