Is he close to old enough to play? If so, just let him play! I remember when I was 10 and Super Mario Bros. 3 was about to finally get released in the U.S. after seeing screen shots of the Japanese version and brief glimpses of its gameplay in "The Wizard" and I was obsessed with finally playing it after months of…

BRING BACK SUPER SOLDIER JOHN LOCKE!!!

There was only one set of footprints in the sand because he was looking at them from a $4 million yacht.

or better yet "American Pie lyrics rapgenius"

If your American pie recipe doesn't include a few bullets, you're a commie.

Well, sure, but it's not like they did it because they were Jewish. It's just coincidental.

but at least they're not making Mallrats 2.

House Middleditch: Our Weisman scores are high.

Great Job Internet Ate My Balls!

10) Jeremy Irons' awesome German accent. Somebody sure had fun!

with white hair, maybe, since Pesci was added in Lethal Weapon 2.

Wow, I forgot about the pillar. Thinking back about it, I would guess it was a relic from an earlier set of Island inhabitants, from a simpler era when a sacrificial ritual solved problems.

and so in the end, it turned out that George R.R. Martin did not, in fact, fart out all his ideas.

Do you mean that guy was the actual voice (and possible visual reference) for Trevor? I can see that now. All I saw before was the love child of Burt Reynolds and Walton Goggins.

Oooh, a song I'm interested in listening to online. Oh wait, a Soundcloud link that has no volume control? Sure, I could easily adjust my PC volume to accommodate one stupid Soundcloud link and fuck up my levels for everything else, but I won't. Too bad, I might have really liked the song and purchased it legitimately…

I saw this beautiful woman in my hotel lobby today. I asked her what she did and she said she was a brain surgeon. Now, I know this sounds sexist but I was impressed! Women usually can't pull off sarcasm.

Kevin Smith is latin for "diminishing returns"

just post a casting call to alt.fan.kevin-smith and watch the audition tapes flood in

I saw Anthony Jeselnik last week and he had a good one: "My girlfriend's mad at me because I killed her plants when she was away. Before she left, she told me: give each plant half a cup of water every other day. But I'm a guy, so all I heard was 'I'm going away for two weeks. Cheat on me.'"

Two!? I've only seen one, and that was already enough.