Hey, Ron was good at chess in the first book. And didn't he come up with the idea of using the basilisk fangs in the last book? So, basically, the dude made major intellectual contributions from start to finish. How could Hermione resist?

I'll admit I didn't know who Linda Sarsour was before this evening (and I still don't really know much about her), but it's inaccurate or extremely misleading to say that she called for a jihad against Trump. First, "jihad" does not mean "terrorism" or "holy war" or "violence". Second, if you read or hear what she…

Fox News, Fox Sports and now Fox Business. The Murdochs just need a sexual-harassment scandal at over-the-air Fox and they'll have hit for the creeper cycle. Or maybe it'll be misogyny bingo. I don't know. It's hard to analogize this nonsense.

I was driving past Pittsburgh on my way back to D.C. on Monday, half-listening to two hosts on a local sports talk radio station. When they weren't talking about hockey, they were talking about some poll to determine the best American band, in recognition of the Fourth of July. The listed candidates were whom you'd…

Hey, it's not fair to describe Trump as "the son of a racist real estate mogul". He's the racist son of a racist real estate mogul. Let's strive for accuracy, folks. (Also: This should be good.)

Did anyone else initially think "We cud have so much fun together" was the language meant to imitate human language?

That short scene — with the song, the brief dialogue before and the fire after — is one of my favorite things in The Simpsons. It makes me laugh far more than it probably should, but it just perfectly captures the suckiness of that party for Bart. (It's actually, "You're the birthday/You're the birthday/You're the…

Yeah, how dare we, when Trump has never made fun of anyone's appearance or speech. We are the mighty legion of anonymous commenters at the A.V. Club, while he is merely the most powerful man on Earth. How we have cruelly exploited that imbalance to bring a helpless man down with our crushing insults.

I've recently started listening to full albums while I'm at work, instead of just streaming random songs from various artists. Over the last several days I've heard all of The White Stripes' albums, from first to last. I've always liked the band, but I wasn't familiar with the depths of its catalog. I liked every…

What's the source of this dispute between Christopher Nolan and the apes? And are we, the rest of humanity, going to be jumping in on either side? I think we could swing this war either way. But even if we just stay neutral, I'm not liking Christopher's chances.

His is apparently the second known case of Trump Punchable Douchebag Face Syndrome, which renders all photographic equipment incapable of producing any images in which people suffering from TPDFS do not have punchable douchebag faces. In other words, cameras capture their souls perfectly.

I always knew TMZ wasn't just shit, but pernicious shit.

Wimbledon! (No one cares about tennis, I know. But I do, dammit.)

Despite — or perhaps because of — your warning, I now really want to hear that Van Halen vocal track. Is it just Dave's vocal, or is it the entire band, but without music?

My sister and I saw U2 in Cleveland on Saturday. I don't think I can hear them live anymore without noting and feeling a bit of disappointment about how Bono's voice is not what it was. I also thought they could have played a few more songs. That said, it was still a very good show. They made the hair on my arms and…

Sounds like a good song.

Robert Johnson, "Me And The Devil Blues"
Cage the Elephant, "Back Against the Wall"
Fugees, "Fu-Gee-La" (Sly & Robbie Mix)
Dixie Chicks, "I Can Love You Better"
George Harrison, "I Live For You"
Foo Fighters, "In Your Honor"
The Who, "I Can't Explain"
Tesla, "What You Give"
The Who, "5.15"
The Shins, "Turn On Me"

I guess that's why I'm still single.

Kenneth's party in the "Greenzo" episode of 30 Rock. (The one everyone goes to because Tracy, sad that no one usually goes to Kenneth's parties, spreads a bunch of lies to get everyone to come.) I'm a dork and usually uncomfortable at parties, but I suspect most of the TGS crew is the same way, so I'd be among my own…

He uses the name of the famous New York lawyer first (unaware that the guy's dead), and then when the judge looks into it, he claims that the judge misheard him, and that his name is actually one letter off the name of the dead guy's. (Callo, not Gallo, I think.) And then his old judge friend in New York lies for him…