Or Groupon.

Night Queef - Under Cover of Darkness
The Gay - Funshine
Chancre Town - Freshman Promises
White Bus Driver - You Are Beautiful
The Fart Jars - A Tribute to Mungo and Jerry
Dad Humor - Pobody's Nerfect!
Seinfeld, the Band - Seinfeld, the Band III
Passive-Aggressive Christmas - No, It's Cool
The Science Fair  - Honorable Mention
…

Within gothic lit, The Castle of Ontranto is rivaled only by Matthew Lewis' The Monk in terms of batshit craziness. Good stuff.

Hyphenation rules imply a natural evolution
From hyphenated compound to an open-compound solution, nigga
And if the word eventually becomes ubiquitous
The compound closes like a small business on Christmas

"How much you gonna riiiiiiiisk, oh yeah, wop wop bim bam boooom."

You know what, I'm going to withhold judgment until I read his open letter to Breivik. If he can support his argument with logical, exhaustive reasoning, then who am I to say that massacre wasn't his only recourse?

It seems like he needs maybe one more year.

It's cute, but they're several-thousand hate-massacres behind the U.S. I admire their spunk nonetheless.

A mischievous scalawag, always plotting murderous shenanigans!

Come on, Lance was the "unthreatening crush object."  Whereas with the other fellas, you got the feeling they were carousing about town all night, drinking Cherry Coke and playing skee-ball like a bunch of maniacs.

"Our goal is to grow a service that people love," texted a marketing exec to a publicist mid-dump.

When I go into a Chipotle, I hear my own voice dictating a suicide note.

The sad part isn't even their stage act. It's the lonely nights at the Ramada Inn, pouring their guts out to the slackened dolls—just before tearfully depositing their testicles into their plush mouths.

The Wild Kidz? Are you fucking serious?

Hmmm. I like safe sex. And I really like "Get Lucky."

Kanye West: "Finally, someone agrees with me."

NBC has already signed off on The Future Testament, in which Jesus descends from Heaven strapped with a flying V and slays the Godless and unrepentant with power chords that explode human heads.

After her performance in Enough, I give her carte blanche with respect to not only honoring those who violate human rights, but also to violating them herself.

"Don't be fooled by the hard currency that I got…"

Out of respect for the actor, we ought to refer to Shia LaBeouf's penis by its actual name—the one he gave it: "Shia LaBeouf."