Yeah, if they're so super, how come I've never heard of 'em?

"Bum fuck, Egypt", a phrase meaning "out in the middle of nowhere" or "the sticks".

Glenn Beck told me there were a few hiding out in the ladies room trying to assault my hypothetical daughter, too. Spooky stuff!

You can just type his name, you know. He's a douchebag Presidential candidate, not Voldemort. Chirst, quit being such drama queens. You guys are acting like it's the end of the world so you can pat yourself on the back for stopping it. Someday you'll tell your gay grandson, "Trump almost took over the world and…

I can tell you didn't read my posts, because I very carefully laid out exactly how the President is limited by a system of checks and balances. Trump could no more lock people up for being black or gay than Obama could close Guantanamo Bay (Remember when he promised to do that?) without support from Congress, and…

That's the thing, the injury is a total gut-punch that came out of nowhere. I might not have read it had I known how it was going to end.

I haven't read that book in 15 years, but I remember it for the way she gets out of those handcuffs. Even as a King fan, and no stranger to gore, that made me wince.

No one who speaks German could possibly be evil!

"I'll be careful."

I don't even have to read every one of your posts (there's an "s" in there) and I can only assume that you're the type of person who uses the word "racist" as a synonym for "person who disagrees with me". Which is sad, because it trivializes the actual racism that still does exist in this country.

I'm so ashamed. I don't even Zumba or Pintrest!

Dammit, Cersei, stop pouring that shit on my face!

I'm reminded of one of my favorite Onion articles, published right after 9/11: "A Shattered Nation Longs To Care About Stupid Bullshit Again".

I don't even like wine (Yet another thing he does that I don't like, weird!) but I do think it's cool that he took a break from something that was earning him shitloads of money to follow his passion… and then by all accounts, kicked ass at it.

He can also do two voices! "Special needs kid" and "special needs kid yelling."

Maynard James Keenan belongs to that rare breed of people where I don't like almost any of the art he produces, but he really seems like a genuine, intelligent, and cool person.

Yeah, Craig had his moments, but he was really one-note. Kinda like Andy Samberg's guest role. Or… Andy Samberg.

Nah, you have to get to at least Operating Thetan Level VII for that.

I know, it's tough. Hang in there.

"First of all, his party would control all three branches of government." I'm glad you put that in the second sentence so I knew to just stop reading there.