Ike didn't have an opinion about you.

I'm waiting for him to roll out New Trump. Everything that you loved about New Coke.

It's turtles all the way down.

*gets sued by Lars Ulrich, still plays guitar in yard*

Around here the crocus is the first flower in spring. It's still too damn cold for tulips and don't even think about irises but those crocuses want to rock and they will not wait.

No bone? Then what the fuck is he trying to accomplish with that stupid guitar? I thought the bone was the whole point.

This is obviously in the US. We don't teach geography in the US.

Free Hat!

Give me a Kinja…

I'll skip this and wait for the inevitable gifs of a shirtless François Arnaud.

Uh, it's a live concert. That bouncing ball is just in your mind.

I'm super! Thanks for asking!

I know our rapping dinosaur is computer-deprived right now but does anyone know why our penguin is more repressed than usual?

Good had nothing to do with it.

She's not an emoji she's Mom (even if her kids have disappeared)!

My grandma went to school with Johnny Carson and she hated him for the right reason. According to her he was a smart ass. He was and it made him famous.

Did you? Let me tell you about your bad habits….

Yep. Put words in my mouth. Everyone likes that.

Because they're kids?

And it's one, two, three
What are we fighting for?
Don't ask me, I don't give a damn,
Next stop is Vietnam.
And it's five, six, seven,
Open up the pearly gates,
Well there ain't no time to wonder why,
Whoopee! we're all gonna die.