Back in the old days Dan never consulted anybody. As a result he sometimes gave out incorrect and sometimes dangerous advice. Case in point was when he once berated someone who said condoms made his dick itchy and caused a rash. He said there was no excuse for not wearing a condom, there were zero excuses for not…

Yeah, this is sort of a Dumbo's magic feather problem. Losing his virginity probably isn't going to help any, but since the brother perceives that no progress can be made until he does, it's gone from if to when and how territory.

Phoenix is a blissful utopia compared to Albuquerque.

You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.

Hail (of bullets) to the V.

"Ursula Andress, Catherine Deneuve, and Charo twice!"

"Moo."

The only flaw in that theory is that Sinatra usually recorded more albums in a year than Timberlake has done in his life.

Well, nothing bad happened the last 5 times he said that. Nothing good happened either.

Such face! She smolders!

After her analysis of "Jackson" I don't expect her to get anything right.

I honestly don't know how it's pronounced, but he has the second best politician name after Brittish Shadow Chancellor Ed Balls.

What's sad is that I recognized that name as the South African Minister of Human Settlements and didn't realize a commenter had swiped it.

Lee Greenwood was always at the Jamboree.

In 89 it was all about the 45 minute laser light/ fireworks show that Steven Spielberg spent 4 million out of his own pocket to produce. That was the most amazing fireworks display I ever saw. For the last 5 minutes there were so many fireworks that you could only fit 2/3 of it in your field of vision.

I seem to remember that Seinfeld had 2 fallow periods it had to recover from.

I just want to be sure I've got this down right.

The President's Neck Is Missing?

Just show 5 minutes of "The Parent Trap", one of her SNL skits at random, and then just have her sit not talking and without makeup for half an hour. If that doesn't scare you, you are not human.

Damsel and Dame are not exactly the same thing.