Letterman's writers.  DA BOMB.  We need a host who brings their own writers.  I suggest Jon Stewart.

Hmmmmmmm.  Nope, just you.

Can we just take this whole string "as read" every FUCKING TIME it comes up?  It's not irony or sarcasm when it becomes a dead horse, people.

Okay, lego boy, we're looking for some batshit insane spin-offs that go awry every time and make us question your sanity, maybe linked to famous literature in some way.  Do it within the next few weeks.  Gimmicks aren't just for fun, they're a responsibility.

Worst-case scenario: The many conflicting elements prove confusing to audiences, and the network, panicked, starts slapping bikinis on everyone for no real reason.

Let it go, son….let it go.

CAN Ratner pull off the almost-unhead-of "trifecta" of three Newsire stories/updates in one day?

Yes.  Yes, it is.

Staffers may slack off, but Commenters never do.

I'm impressed that you did background research before finishing your Comment.

Really?  Cause I'm digging this stuff, and hoping it influences the next round of national elections in unexpected ways.

This is the first Newswire article I've ever thought about posting on my Facebook account.

Awwwww that's so sweet and FLAG FLAG FLAG FLAG FLAG

Not sure about the "Goblin of Lies" bit but I'll take it.

It's not just the X-Files that are played out….it's the live chat.

Meh.

Newest first is safest.  Refresh button instead of using real-time, unless you don't mind a random pile of things NOT attached to what they're responding to.  They're still changing things, so it may be more stable in another hour or two.  Have fun!

@avclub-eb573591cef285c12701571987b08381:disqus you got that right!

Replicant blurry.

I really hope we get to keep these "reply" buttons under each Comment.  Except the really skinny ones.  It's so much easier than tossing comments and insults WAY up threads if you miss something by 20 comments.