The whole tone of this article is late period Buzzfeed.

It's called Facegong

Why send them to shelters when you can have them mill about waiting for thousands of flying reptiles to snatch them? Why weren't they at least allowed to go up to their rooms?

That fucking movie. We could have been spared Jesse Eisenberg if it weren't for that fucking movie.

That militarized dino plan was kind of confusing anyway. What was the idea? Just release a bunch of raptors in the desert and hope they eat ISIS?

Jaws 3 was hot garbage, at least JW had production value. J3 was crap even in the eighties.

The problem with recreating the awe is that by the very next movie the majesty has to be diminished since we've already been well-indoctrinated into a world with dinosaurs. That's why I thought it was sort of ingenious for them to portray people in Jurrasic World in their true form: fickle and easily bored. The older…

It is funny how the whole fiasco could have been avoided if she had simply called the control center to track the Dino as her first action, instead of delaying a potential mitigation strategy by running outside to her car and dialing from the road (where she also could have been nabbed had the dinosaur actually been…

It's interesting that they get those most praise as I think they have the most problems.

If we got them husbands maybe I could finally be racist, sexist, and homophobic again without being hassled on Twitter.

Star Wars fans are experts on multi-lateral trade negotiations and embargoes. Just don't mention sand. They hate sand.

In fairness, you're describing what can only be labeled a 'super minority' of people, consisting of certain university students under the age of 21. The solution is obvious - lower the drinking age so everyone relaxes and has a little fun.

So are the Kids in the Hall, apparently.

I honestly feel like I'm having a stoke reading that comment. The grammar is incompressible and there are expressions that aren't part of normal speech (e.g. 'Pulling up' people for their actions).

I thought I couldn't understand a word of this post because I'm drunk, but I backed it up like three times and I still have no idea what you're trying to say.

They can put it in the Honey I Shrunk the Kids Cinematic Universe.

At least a Micro Machines movie would have a loose concept to work with.

It's a highly enjoyable movie that is actually not that competently directed or edited.

Well we're not killing Tom Petty and Harrison is dead, so if you want Dylan out of the picture you can damn well do it yourself.

I'm assuming Jeff Lynne is the one you could do without?