I guess they were too high to decide where they'd be playing in Philly.

"Fancy a shag, love?" Michelangelo said to Donatello. Suddenly, Master Splinter walked in, completely nude.

Let me guess…Atreyu?

Klassic Fallon reruns are the worst.

Ellen Degeneres should have lip synched "Ellen Degeneres."

What I felt when I read your comment is the closest I'll ever get to early 2000s nostalgia.

Please Please Please Let Me Get a 1-Up.

Girlfriend in another castle
I know, I know
It's really serious.

So metal is a masculine noun, huh? Seems legit.

Pardon me?

(deep breath)

They should give it to someone who wants the (Ph)D.

I didn't know you were a paleontology student.

The TA with T&A
The Adjunct's Ad-junk
Bursar? I Hardly Know 'er!
Putting the "Vice" in Vice Provost for Academic Affairs

Here are some TIE fighters chasing a squadron of Y-Wings:

The lone survivor of the wreck of the SS Daily Show was rescued from the tropics

Pssh, I'm waiting until they hand pickle locally sourced vinyl in small batches.

You could get Blacklisted for those puns.

Based on your avatar, I'm assuming you're the WTTW hacker.

The AV Club