Someone should put Trump in a pageant. That'd knock 'im down a peg.

All are better than Kid Rock.

A surrogate noodle? What a time to be alive!

I have a friend with a bad case of whiskey noodle. It's a real shame because he doesn't even drink whiskey.

I hear the guy who does the sound is a bit dull, too.

I thought she was especially good in her role in Into the Wild.

Wow, they are really taking Batman in a new and exciting direction.

PEWPEWPEWPEWPEWPEWPEW

This movie sounds like it's going to be a real hatchet job.

I here that if you figure out a way to dupe other players into letting you bet against yourself you can't go bankrupt or go to jail!

"Anything the man backs seems to succeed on some level."
Counterpoint: The MacGruber Movie

How would a whale get meth? Come on, think with your brain.

*cock

I don't know if we're in heaven, but if I've learned anything from Cake it's that sheep go to heaven, but goats go to hell.

"Move that flickering lightbulb hanging from the ceiling to just above the basket. It doesn't move? Hang another flickering lightbulb on the other side."

I just watched Moonrise Kingdom, and although I liked it, I thought that even the parents' dysfunctional relationship failed to mesh with Anderson's overtly tidy set arrangements and filming style.

Until they unionize.

Thank You!?! Them's CITY manners!

Jon, what are you doing? You can leave New Jersey now! Ya know what, I'm just going to leave this nice hot shoo-fly pie just west of the river, and you can make up your own mind.

Tusk!