Seems like a nice enough fellow.
And I don't care what anyone says about the film's merits: the final five minutes of The Blair Witch Project are among the most primally terrifying I've seen in a theatre. Brilliantly done.

Ha! Yeah, fuck them!

Try to tell that to these damned kids now, with their Dan Fogleberg and their hula-hoops…

It's a first try for us, Jimbolaya, so perhaps it's premature to declare it a winning solution.

As a kid, in the video store…
…there was almost nothing cooler than the Remo Williams box, with him holding onto one of the fucking spikes at the top of the fucking crown of the STATUE OF FUCKING LIBERTY, all while some ass circling in a helicopter found the degree of difficulty just a tad light, SO HE WAS OPENING…

I'm going to soak my crotch in halibut and eel leavings, run a quick rotisserie chicken skin through my hair, and go as Ann Coulter.

Where's Don Cornelius when you need him?
I'd like to take a ride on the SOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUULLLLLLLL TRAIN!

Hayden Panettiere.
Say what you will about how shitty he was in the Star Wars prequels, but he absolutely nails the role of a vapid blonde skank seen through rose-colored glasses. Nearly unrecognizable.

.
I'm gonna let this buttfuckin' Brady Bunch go!

That's rearry, rearry disappointing.

Is she in whiteface for a reason?
Loved you on Hollywood Squares!

Yes!
My lady refuses to see this, even though I want to.
I refuse to see Transformers 2, even though she wants to.

Whatever reason works for you.

Dave, what's sagacious mean?

It was either Martha or George.

My Bagg'ns tend to
Make mall security guards
Yell, "THOU SHALL NOT PASS!"

Isn't that every night, and twice on Boxing Day?

I ain't got time to make you bleed.

Jorge, the answer to that question is always "FABulous!"

Ah, Full Metal, but to the punch you have been beaten, and by far lesser minds: