Anytime anybody says a song should get a Grammy, I choose to interpret it either as an insult to the song or to the Grammys. Either way, this guy was right.

From anecdotal evidence, I've decided that the best thing that can be said about Train is that they know exactly what they are, what they're doing, and who likes their music. They take private corporate gigs, get paid handsomely, and put on clean, professional-sounding shows while the lead singer shamelessly flirts…

I, too, was guilty of this. I still have serious reservations about your reality, however.

Holy sweet Jesus-flavored shitsnacks. Do old people even say shit like that anymore? I seriously thought Andy Rooney was the last one.

When The Bobs covered it, they changed that line to "I hate people when they're too polite." I enjoyed it, and assumed for several years that it was the original line.

For what it was, it was well-executed - at least when it focused on the characters and didn't try too hard to convince the audience that any of this shit was even remotely plausible. The guest stars did solid work, and Noble killed it as usual.

Personally I was disappointed with the implication that William Bell offed Olivia with something as simple as a bullet.

That boy plays the hell out of Peter Bishop. It's probably the best rogue-done-good male sci-fi protagonist I've seen in a long, long time. It's easy to forget how good he is, though, with Noble hanging around pooping out Emmy-worthy performances like a fiber fanatic.

Well, they're becoming other-aware at least. I'm not sure a spammer that becomes self-aware would survive through the initial waves of embarrassment and ennui.

Just look at that picture and draw your own conclusions.

Ah, humanity: because actual vultures only eat actual carrion.

The "B" in Beat-aping is capitalized for a reason. My work here is done. Google-man and Wiki-dude will be along to do the heavy lifting.

It was more of a bang for assistance.

There's definitely a good show in here somewhere, but I think the show as-is wins a seasonal award for "show with the highest number of distinct elements that don't work." The pilot setup didn't work, Hank doesn't work, Juliette doesn't work, the main character's wildly oscillating competency doesn't work, the lead…

You know you've made a bad viewing decision when the biggest laugh you get from a show is when a ketchup bottle is strongly implied to have fallen out of a supporting character's ass.

You know, not many people enjoyed his work in TSSC, but I thought he and Summer Glau developed a very interesting, nuanced rapport in that show - at least in the episodes where their characters' relationship was allowed to breathe a bit.

You don't think "pi is exactly 3" in a circle is meant to be "clever?"

How profoundly vegetative must your entire client base and circle of acquaintances be that not one of them has come up with a single tattoo idea worse than that one?

My theoretical tattoo changes regularly, but today it's a simple phrase:

Can we please just have Adam be gay already? Hasn't Dekker closed his eyes and thought of England enough?