Hear that, everyone? IF WE DON'T SPEND THANKSGIVING MASTURBATING, THE CANADIANS WILL WIN!

In case anyone from a company was wondering whether sending free shit to AV Club was a good investment: the Rube Goldberg book and a Litograph t-shirt went right on my Christmas list. That shit is awesome.

I still get an involuntary boner whenever I see a vampire wearing a snake.

It's up to us to save porn, guys! EVERYONE SPEND THANKSGIVING FAPPING!

WON'T SOMEONE THINK OF A CHIPMUNK

Wholly aside from the song question, this ad is not as clever as it thinks it is.

TOO VAGUE

I used to fuck guys like Rob Cohen in prison.

Me! I am doing jack shit at work today!

lol

*slow clap*

NOW IT WANTS CAKE

Ah ha, this is hilarious. She looks like she's painting her toenails. Thanks for this.

Jimi Hendrix is still the best electric guitar player who's lived. Machine Gun is a good choice!

Hey check it out guys, it's a gimmick account where the gimmick is being wrong about everything.

Yee ha.

What's your problem with masturbation?

Who the fuck are you calling we?

It's a thing, but it's a stupid thing.

There is not enough Neil Young, that's true.