Shit, I screwed that up.

so…
So, Ryan Reynolds is the Katy Perry of metaphors?

Evil henchman.

Oh cool. Thanks, gents(?). I've only seen the Bi-Furious commercial, and the only trailer I've seen is the one where Edgar Wright shows up to explain the movie. (Which… why?)

help
Can anyone who has seen an advance screening of this movie please tell me: 1.) if they carried over the "BREAD MAKES YOU FAT?" line? and 2.) if they kept the bit where Wallace bribes Ramona into letting Scott stay at her house for the night (so he can take a guy home) by promising to be her "dipping sauce bitch"?

"She OBEDIENTLY performed oral sex on him. Five feet away, the other teenage girl sat on a mattress on the floor and watched, greedily sucking on a crack pipe Robo had passed to her. Edgar looked over and grinned, showing yellow, decaying teeth. Obviously he preferred oral sex to oral hygiene."

"Upon entering the apartment, Tommy's ears met a loud, pulsating noise that seemed to resemble music.

So, wait. Is that a for-real excerpt from something he wrote, or am I being had?

@Dr.Robuttnik

What Phil Ken Sebben said.

Yeah, what Dr.Robuttnik said, basically. I'm one of those asshats who still likes physically owning CDs and displaying them on a gigantic CD shelf and whatnot. But sometimes you get a coupon for like 40%, and it knocks the price below what you'd pay on Amazon! (Okay, only by a dollar, BUT STILL.)

Don't scare me like that! I want to go to there.

true story
I was paying for some books and CDs at Borders a few years ago, and some clerk announced over the intercom: "Will the customer who was looking for a copy of The O'Reilly Factor for Kids please come to the information desk?" My cashier said: "Did he just say The O'Reilly Factor FOR KIDS?" I nodded, probably…

Netflix
A Netflix user review said this movie would be much funnier to people who weren't into the D&D thing at all. True?

HAVE MERCY.

Re: your mom. It must've been somewhere between reassuring (depending on what age you were and your relationship with your parents) and terrifying (regardless).

Somebody will get out of an SUV without underpants while somebody else is attacking said SUV with an umbrella?

In what year is the cast supposed to be? Juniors? Sophomores?

Across the Universe is fantastically terrible. So, yeah, I more or less agree.

Sorry, jonnieboy.