The American school system: "Nail everything and get hammered."

No, silly. That's mormons.

Not at all. But you probably do bring the chardonnay.

Please go enter this lovely definition into that shit-hole urbandictionary so some of the assholes to which it applies might accidentally encounter it.

Hipster sweaters? Man, if you want to destroy them, hold this thread as I walk away.

That's Soviet lady gulag guards I could do.

Hey! Get out of my dreams! (and while you're at it, you might as well get into my car)

2016? Oh, you mean the Year of the Monster Energy Drink.

Best suggestion I've heard (which I encountered about halfway through reading Infinite Jest, so … like a year in) is to rip the book in two parts where the footnotes begin. Flipping back and forth sucks compared to keeping the "footnote book" open to where you left off.

I didn't acknowledge its existence before its existence was cool.

Which—while gross—is still superior to the Drumstick on the Rag combo.

spreading to America's fast food eateries at an ever-quickening pace

More like auto-erotic.

*Cue jaunty theme song/brand jingle*

Wait… Which Stallone?

You guessed it … Frank Stallone.

"Walker told me I have AIDS."

Everybody gets a Big Ass Ham!!! Everybody gets a Big Ass Ham!!! Everybody gets a Big Ass Ham!!!

It seems like such a inconsequential choice to not put up their names during the series, but man … the impact at the end when they do … such a huge difference.

Sometimes I go around licking door handles during flu season, just crossing my fingers and hoping for a reason to be laid out on the couch for several days. I think out of the 5-6 times I've watched BoB, at least 3 have been power-watching the whole box set while sick at home.