Last night was the first time I watched Benched live instead of DVRed, and I caught about five minutes of that thing. I couldn't figure out what was going on. Seriously, no one realizes that dude is gay as a goose?

The first thing I thought when that client showed up was, why doesn't he just turn the shirt inside out? And then I couldn't stop thinking that, and it lessened the ongoing shirt-based comedy for me.

Jackie Jormp-Cop: A 1960s rock star, long thought dead, has actually been in suspended animation. Awakened in the 21st century, she joins the San Francisco PD. Hilarity ensues as she clashes with her straitlaced superiors, fails to recognize technology that actually existed in the '60s, and shoots a crapload of heroin.

Do you actually watch Grimm or was that some sort of username-based humor? Anyway, they've been shooting in my neighborhood recently. I've never watched it but now I feel compelled to, just so I can see places I recognize on TV. (See also: Portlandia.) Will I be sorry?

The Wishing Chair is one of my favorite records. I still have it on vinyl, along with Secrets of the I Ching.

Disagree on the "she's never been cool" part. Pre-In My Tribe Natalie was the shit. Witness: http://www.youtube.com/watc…

I was just talking about "Who Are You?" the other day, because it features the most erotic non-sex scene I've ever seen.

Ceci n'est pas un pipe…c'est une pipe.

Trebek is preternaturally charming in those after-show chats. When I was on I was INCREDIBLY PISSED OFF about losing, yet in the end credits I can be seen smiling and laughing like I haven't a care in the world. But as soon as the camera stopped rolling Trebek was gone in a flash, and I immediately wanted to murder…

Clue: Blah blah French painter blah blah Tahiti.

Speaking of punk rock movies, I finally watched We Are the Best over the weekend. It was inspiring and endearing and freaking awesome and everybody who plays and/or loves music should watch it.

And here's something I just realized last night: Amy's last name is Santiago, or "Sant Iago" ("St. James"). And Iago is derived from the Hebrew name—wait for it—Jacob.

The Clash was my Clash, but I love the sentiment. I'm a huge fan of PE as well. Nation of Millions is just a notch or two below London Calling on my list of greatest records.

Look at those guys, man. In 1988 I couldn't imagine anything cooler. And still totally fucking cool. Even all the wacky shit Flav's done since then can't undercut it.

Heh. Would that I could write a book half as good as that one.

Bats are awesome. Years ago I decided to write a fantasy novel set in the world of bats—little brown bats, to be specific. The heroine's name was Vesper, which you have to admit is a good name for a bat. And hey, no one had ever written a novel about bats before!

I find that as I get older this is more and more true. I'm blonde and pale as fuck, and in my youth I was almost exclusively into girls with black hair and olive skin. (Italian girls, basically. I'm from New Jersey; they were plentiful.) Nowadays I definitely seem to go more for blondes. My current crush has literally…

On October 24th, Lauren Graham was asked to remove herself from her network of residence. That request came from NBC. With nowhere else to go, she appeared at the network of her ex-boyfriend Matthew Perry. Several years earlier, NBC had thrown him out, requesting that he never return. Can two former flames share a…

I wrreerawwwowww like Anthrax, split my pants like Bill Bixby
You could tell the tracks was fat from the work of my MP-60

You have no soul, and you employed a misplaced modifier. I'm not sure which is worse.