Hey, insufficiently stimulated horny teens: For the record, Certified Copy is playing at the weirdo foreign theater next door, and it's UNRATED. You know what that means…

All I know is I saw some posters where some marketing people ordered me to believe the legend, and, once I had done that, beware the wolf. I assume these are the same people who once told me to release my kraken.

Not that lesbians have to look masculine, but for the record, she is in fact a lesbian, according to the internets.

NOLF was great, and I have friends who swear that NOLF 2 was even better. I never got around to playing it, though. I think I heard the rights to the franchise were now in a complicated state and so there's little hope we'll ever see it again. Sad.

Yeah, the new game is supposed to be some sort of survival thing, where a scrappy teen (or early 20s?) named Lara Croft finds herself washed up on an island somewhere. If the screenshots can be trusted, she's more or less realistically proportioned and spends a lot of the game looking wet and muddy, so there's that.…

@GhaleonQ, whataworkout
"I think it's incredibly obvious that at least some games are art, especially narrative-driven ones." "The aspect of video games that I consider art is the design, not the aesthetics."

Daisuke Amaya (creator of Cave Story) gave a talk on game design at GDC this year, apparently the first time a doujin creator has been invited to speak. (Note #1: I'm so proud!) (Note #2: Cave Story and other Japanese indie game development is actually a bit removed from the "doujin" scene, but there isn't much of a…

When your language and naming system can result in dudes named Batman, you gotta cut Westerners some slack for fixating on the process.

Zombies can't hold their smoke
No, really, they can't, it swiftly escapes through the several large holes in their nonfunctioning lungs and drifts out from various locations on their decomposing body, it's kind of gross and fascinating at the same time, guys.

When Friday Buzzkills went away I was very sad, but now that it's become clear that it was to spread the buzzkills through the entire week in the form of the Newswire, it's the best thing that's ever happened in the history of North America!

"Hush, my sweet," murmured O'Neal, as he embraced his trembling colleague in the secluded A.V. Club break room, "it's time for a very special Taste Test."

Biutiful
I'm rooting for Biutiful. I haven't seen it, so I am free to imagine that it is nothing but two and a half hours of Javier Bardem wandering around saying "Biutiful!" in a Spanish accent. OSCAR GOLD

Oh, OK, I guess my comment got deleted, presumably due to quoting Mr. Banton's recent comments that "this is a war between me and [rhymes-with-maggot]". Anyway, my point was that, OK, so he grew up in a regressive culture and so of course he wrote a repulsive song as a teenager, and of course he still stands by it,…

At this point he's probably the most famous Oberlin grad. Hey Julie Taymor and Josh Ritter, suck it!

Jokes are great! Jokes as replacements for answers to legitimate consumer inquiries, not so much!

I'm not sure why they ignored PC online multiplayer, but I -really- don't understand why they cut the local player limit to two. That sounds like a nontrivial code change from the console versions; why go to that much work just to remove features?

I'm just happy to have made a difference in your life!

Negative Spacecraft
I was hoping it'd be in the list, but a friend of mine at Paper Dino Software just released a new browser game. It's a bullet-dodging game (similar to some Touhou shooters, if you know those) with a black-and-white theme. Weave your way through the patterns, and use your ability to turn bad things…

Monster A Go-Go is worth watching… once. (C'mon, that ending!)

LAME