I was surprised at how well this episode worked. I completely bought into the arc with Elliot and the daughter, cheesy as it was. The spinning camera shot of Elliot went on a little too long, but amped up the intensity well. While that shot was happening, I was thinking "These Russians are about to be toast," so…

That's a good point, llama; who will think of the vegetables? They were violently torn from the earth when they were at their prime, deprived of life for our own selfish desires. Morrissey is a fucking hypocrite.

Thanks Judge, putting Vaseline on my nips sounds like a good solution. Although then I'll probably have to contend with a hard on. It's never easy, is it?

I count 135. 135 different MST3K quotes, almost all of them from different AV Club members. This is indeed the greatest comment section of any website on earth.

The other point to consider (which I think is one of the things they try to get across in the podcast) is that some reviews are written better than others, and there are times when as a writer you wish you could've used a different tone or explained your viewpoint a bit more clearly. You can't dwell on the bad ones…

Sweet Jesus. If I'm ever going to run a marathon, I'm wearing a sports bra and I don't care WHO called me a cross-dresser.

That last comment
Is from O'Neal, right? Well, whoever it was, well done. Although I nearly had to explain what I was laughing so hard about to my coworkers, which would've been awkward. "You see, there's this product called Bear Semen…."

Wait, why would marathon runners get bloody nipples?

Won't most… guns… shoot… mice? Did I miss some development that made mice impervious to gunfire?

I have always been a fan of Archmage, and the "Jain's Addiction" comment merely cements that opinion. Archmage, if I may borrow your schtick, I hereby award you a +4 on all Pithiness rolls and you may cast the spell Pun of the Mighty twice per day without having to memorize or prepare it beforehand.

I don't think the grades are the problem, though. No reasonable person would look at the grade and think it's going to encapsulate a review to perfection. The confusing thing about the Scott Pilgrim review was it did a great job of explaining why the film had significant problems, but then went on to call it…

When I first saw the thread topic I thought it said "The 2011 NBA season was one for the fucking apes," and thought, WTF!?? I need better contact lenses.

I'll be right back—gotta drain the Little Buddy.

You make a good point, OP, but it also would be a different movie if it didn't include a character writing a book about the racial underclass in question, which apparently sparks the central conflict in the story between said underclass and their employers.

The Olyphant in the Room
"But back then, the limited number of networks and shows meant that 'TV stars' were in shorter supply, and that those few that made it on the air had the advantage of a promotional system to rival the Hollywood movie studios in the contract era."

Wow, that's really smelly jizz. Or you stand inappropriately close to people.

I was thinking the same thing, Built For Greed—whoever that guy is, he's at least 68 years old. Did Urban age unnaturally fast somehow?

Best line
"You'd figure the star of K-Pax and The Life Of David Gale would have better judgment than to get involved with a dodgy-sounding project of questionable taste and quality."

I've got sort of the same problem, G. Bob, only my eyes usually just start to water a bit. I can pretty much keep it under control.

I Thought the Eagles Were Totally Hardcore
…when I was 9, because I heard 'Heartache Tonight' on the bus every morning, mis-heard the chorus as "Hard Egg Tonight," and concluded the lyrics were about the band looking for someone to RAPE.