And Tim Krabbé’s The Rider is probably the best bicycling book ever. I have read it 20 times.

How about Scott Baio?

Wait a minute! My stand mixer doesn't work!

And she spits in each one.

When my wife was just a little white girl she and her then (okay, still) adorable African American brother got Conrad Bain's autograph. This was before Diff'rent Strokes. Everybody just soak in the implication here.

Or the heart of a hardened G.I. who thought he'd forgotten how to love.

and the humidity!

Which thread? I teach a class on blackface and am always looking for stupid things people say about it.

Can I play Max Roach?

You could never make that comment today.

[In a higher octave] or [sings The Bee Gees' Tragedy]?

I have a teenager. I know what that means.

I sold tens of them out of my trunk this year.

*agrees to come back on Nov. 3rd and take CDs back*

Depp doesn't want to offend God.

*of America.

Yes. This is America.

Quotes!

Rogen will get bitten by a snake, Franco will bite back.

That's not what Dr. Jekyll said.