Tom Petty was never a favorite of mine till I saw him and the Heartbreakers play live. A true rock 'n' roll band. And a swell fellow. They're still not in my top 5, but they're up there.

Phantom Evil (Krewe of Hunters) by Heather Graham

of Doooooooooooosh Bags.

That picture looks like a meeting of The Fraternal Order of Douchebags, and they're holding a strategy conference to plan how best to deal with their arch rivals, the League of Assholes.

Well, there were some things in the 90s that didn't completely, totally, utterly suck, such as David Lynch movies and Sade, but no, the 90s sucked. They sucked hard. The 90s gave us Creed and Pepsi Clear. Hmmph.

But that's not fun. Not fun at all.

Now this seems to be precisely the sort of emotionally overwrought, psychologically dense subject for which Aaron Sorkin's particular gifts are so ideally suited. I liked The Social Network and Moneyball well enough, but felt that those films' grim, somber tones were excessive for the relatively lightweight subject…

The Church is green with envy at how the Hulk gets away scott free with all the emotional and psychological destruction which he has wrought upon society… The Church is, um, not good.

Yes, he's only exploiting the election as a stunt to promote himself, his name, and his properties. Despite his apparent cluelessness about the mindset and temperament of the larger population he's still attracting a certain margin of ardent support and fascination from a sizable swatch of the country which actually…

Sure, if that home is in 1859 Arkansas.

Hey, I luv 'em both soooo much!

My appreciation and even love of Sean O'Neal and his wacky wry writings is inversely proportional to my roiling, seething contempt for that pale gangly Paltrow monstrosity. Hmmph.

Ha! You're old…

Oh, I certainly do recoil at even the earliest early morning glimmer of those wretched rays. And though each and every day I viciously curse the bloated stupid face of that celestial ass clown, I do, however, regretfully resign myself to the bitter truth that our absurdly chipper and unwelcome neighbor will persist in…

Hitler, but only because he's dead. Mostly dead.

Funny how? It amuses you, like a clown?

Stop that! You stop that right now, mister, or there's no dessert for you tonight. Or porn. Hmmph.

What a tortured metaphor you've crafted, a metaphor perhaps similar in effect to the futile efforts of countless unwitting patriots valiantly toiling to defend the noble name of this chaste and virtuous land like so very many industrious but uninformed ants ceaselessly laboring on behalf of the colony, from birth till…

And I see instances of shit continually on E!. And c-span.

"Fix" as in how the mafia fixes 'tings.