Don't you mean Tom Snyder?

For the life of me, I swear to God, I couldn't tell the difference between my 42 year old wife and my neighbor's 19 year old cheerleader daughter, which is what I explained to my wife when she walked in on me and my neighbor's daughter. Hmmph.

Tithing is the means by which we subsidize our evil quest for World Dominance. Muah ha ha…

But He can't act his way out of a paper bag. Of course, He can miracle Himself out of a paper bag, but that's a special effect.

…Singular delusion
Every thing he imaginates
One! Obsessive fascination
Every adolescent masturbates

Max Bialystock abides.

It wasn't so much a club, more of an army. A singing and dancing army.

Some folks like a big thick steak
Some prefer a broiled bird
Others opt for ham that's baked
Your taste is the last word
But if you crave a human turd
I recommend the meatloaf.

*swallows monocle*

I always side with the person with the most massive plastic tits.
(Yes, Anderson Cooper.)

I believe he meant—as would I—that Comi-Con is a scene of unimaginable human devastation where great masses of humanity are tragically, horrifically laid waste by demonic, monstrously misguided, nefarious forces, in this case comics and comics related media. Hmmph.

OK, my child, I will desist from my noisome ways, but only because I have a fine roast duckling awaiting my gastronomic attentions. But seriously, the Breasts!

It was Comi-Con, Michael! COMIC-CON!

Miley's droning croaking off key caterwauling is ridiculously dreadful. I sometimes enjoy things ironically for their awfulness, but this is just too much. Too much. Hmmph.

People now have security cams, nanny cams, and spy cams. It's all the rage.

You possess a clear and fierce point of view. Very fierce. Hmmph.

You task me. You task me…

Your superpower seems to be Extreme Righteous Indignation. Awesome. Hmmph.

The AV Club

Ev-ah. Hmmph.