Are you under the impression that Fant4stic 4 is better than Stop or My Mom Will Shoot?

Oh, look at Mr. Comedy-expert over here!

"We shampoo, then shampoo. Then condition, and condition. If all else fails… to-may-to sauce."

But his chin is now proportional to the rest of his body.

Hey guys, let me tell you about the time I shot a bunch of black people in New Orleans for kicks!
Oh, Chris!
/laughtrack

Would you make Billy Bob Thornton that offer?
Forget it, that would require Billy Bob Thornton to write a song that anyone gave two shits about.

To be fair, if they had been consecutive, that would have stretched readers' suspension of disbelief.

Mr. Fuji fell on his kendo stick, when it all went wrong,
And Skandar Akbar sold him the river for a song,
And the Great Kabuki rubbed some salt into your eyes,
Some things you do for money, and some you do for the love of Missy Hyatt.
Ivan Koloff felt sick, but he couldn't say why,
When he saw his face reflected in Magnum…

The Chairman of WCW?

I think there will be lot of people who are Mountain Goat fans, and who were fans of wrestling in the 70's and 80's.
They are called "lonely nerds."

I could not be more excited about this if every copy came with a free blowjob.
Why do I think the Von Erichs will be featured?

Jesse the Body helped him with the last rep!!!

https://www.youtube.com/wat…

No, never.

Trife? Does he mean "tripe"? Or "trifle"? Oh King Driis… your lack of vocabulary has done you in again!

I am from the future. Freddie Prinze Jr. never becomes a bankable movie star. But "The Rockafeller Skank" is now the national anthem!

We aren't complaining about "stylized" dialogue, we are complaining about "suck-ass" dialogue.
No one around here is complaining about "Brick".

Not at all like Laura Pleasants'… uh… "sludge metal."

I'm seeing double! Four drummers!!

Yeah, basically this entire article can be boiled down to:
"Why do you hate Nickelback?"
"Cause they suck."