THIS SHITS CHESS
IT AIN'T CHECKERS!!!

Dear Sam Adams
I like your beer but you are DEAD TO ME SIR….DEAD TO ME!!!

Boner
Is it best to be an obscure schmuck like me…or be known as Boner to millions?

Random Roles?
More like Random Boners

When I get depressed I just start jamming to 'Friends Forever' and all my worries are carried away.

I Say Subway You Say Hero!
Come on…we need more Dennis Duffy in our lives.

THE ICE MAN COMETH!!!

Klosterman
If this means we're going to get a new essay from him about 'The Passion of the Lil Wayne' I'm all for it.

I remembered it was Hyundai. As opposed to what, a dorito samuri?

I will not tweet all day about how unethical and sad/demoralizing I find professional football b/c its annoying. But it is how I feel.

No Love for Hyundai???
The best commercial of the night was the one with Brett Favre winning the 2020 MVP and going on about being old. You don't have to be a sports fan to know the whole Favre story and even your sister site The Onion have made fun of the situation.

My Favorite Badass
Tom Cruise as Vincent in Collateral. The first time I saw this movie the moment that the film turned is when those two dudes take his briefcase out of the taxi. He cautiously approaches them before dropping them like a bad mother.

Chris Mincher
Good to see he endorses a middle class white man who hates Koreans.

That Oliver Stone Story is Great
I can just see Stone getting all pissed off and terrorizing Mr. Harris. Also Alexander was a piece of shit.

This is Why I love Random Roles
I like when you talk to one of "those guys" who isn't a leading man or I suppose woman in a ton of pictures but is an actor who has built a solid resume in smaller roles. You learn about the process and the person. It makes you realize that even if you're not getting the most screen…

Black Flag Sticker
That is actually the one thing that pushed me to over the top hatred of that song (cover).

Trick question…it was the same episode! Sam leaps into Sasha Grey as she is getting pissed on….OH BOY

Harry Potter
I've never read any of the books and actually only watched the first two movies out of a seeming obligation to the greater pop culture world. The worst part is I like playing Pub Trivia and there are always teams with 'THAT' Harry Potter dude/chick who knows where Scumbulous Bumblefuck grew up and what…

To Quote Norm Macdonald
STOP…STOP….Stop or My Mom Will Shoot Sucked.

I'm Late But I hope To God You Read This Nathan
In a frenzy of post drinking rage I came home and not only started watching random SNL episodes via Netflix instant streaming, but I delved head first in to a lot of the SNL retrospective articles the AV Club has written (old reviews, talking about how SNL is still for…