Rules are a good idea for keeping a community together. But these seem to be the dumbest rules possible.

He did some math in tonight's episode, so he must be wicked smart.

To my ear, jazz is just noise. Just an insolent noise.

Remember Ann Coulter's line, "we should invade their countries, kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity." Not all "outsider critiques" are this nutty and extreme, but they're usually based in complete contempt for and ignorance of the countries we're trying to "help."

Lick my boots, you lowly 2! For I have 3 MeowMeowBeenz!

The truth isn't racist…but all racists mistake their own pea-brained version of the truth for the real deal. And all racists would say, "I'm not a racist…I'm just telling the simple truth about why 'they' are such horrible people." Whoever 'they' happen to be.

ABC Family axes Alice in Arabia, cancels Christmas

There are one or two Star Trek episodes where an alien gets trapped on the Enterprise, unbeknownst to the crew (the sci-fi equivalent of guy gets stuck in the trunk).

I'm so old that I was a little too old to be playing with toys by the time GI Joe and Transformers came along. I had tons of Star Wars crap, but just one GI Joe, I think (Snake Eyes).

Snow Job

My cat focuses her anarchist energies on destroying my couch.

I didn't say that pulling fire alarms (or shouting 'fire') is harmless or permissible. Common sense tells us that it doesn't count as protected free speech, and should be stopped/punished…but the example is a red herring, (usually) totally irrelevant to the case that it's supposed to illuminate…just like the "ticking…

“No animal has more liberty than the cat, but it buries the mess it makes. The cat is the best anarchist.”
- Hemingway, For Whom the Bell Tolls

I was being a smart-ass, so maybe my point didn't get through. Here's another try…

Not to change the subject, but today I learned that there are nine Children of the Corn films. Nine! So much catching up to do.

Just like the UN, trying to make us all happy with their black helicopters and smiles and communism.

Obviously, the AV Club wanted to get a discussion of Fred Phelps' death going (a news item that doesn't really fit their pop culture agenda), so they dug up the Patton Oswalt essay to get the ball rolling. Notice that most of the comments are about Phelps and very few are about Oswalt.

^ This comment should get 10,000 likes.

Hard to believe that people shouting "fire" in crowded theaters was once a big enough problem that they had to pass laws against the practice. It's entirely hypothetical, a bit of rhetoric that's used to justify other claims. Like when your parents would say, "if your friends jumped off a bridge, you wouldn't do…

Ah, "First Amendment zones," which might as well be called censorship zones, since that's their main purpose. Sure, your free speech is protected, so long as you don't step outside this cage that we've provided for you…