First pop punk album I ever got was MxPx's Life in General. My parents wouldn't let me listen to any non Christian music and for some reason MxPx was a Christian band. I don't think I had access until anything that didn't come out on Tooth and Nail records until like age 11 or 12.

Favorite part of this album is the story about Rick Ross dropping a large stack of money and the ensuing debate over what's more valuable; the stack of money itself or the time Rozay would spend bending down to pick it up. Pretty much the most Rick Ross thing ever. I also am pleasantly surprised by this album and 100%…

"I look at Haiti children dyin' round the clock, nigga/I'd spend a hundred grand but that's a decent watch, nigga"

I AM THE ONE WHO WOKS!

*hangs head in shame, shows self the door*

IS IT IN THE SHOES!!??

I hated Celeste & Jesse solely because Rashida Jones character was a pop culture trend forecaster. Because that's a real job that people have. If romantic comedies were realistic, a Chili's waitress's and an American Eagle Asst. Manager would meet at a Quicktrip, and exchange sexually charged texts until one of their…

Nathan Fillion can star in my Castlevania movie I'm writing.

"Thanks to the lame ass miming, I'm going home!" *slams microphone on stage*

Y'all gon' make me stand my ground up in here up in here….

Curt Henning?

Good things don't end in -mageddon…..they end in mania….or teria.

Pitch-er Act 2: Back in the Habit

"What an amazing visual…..fuck you podcast listener"

Macklemore is rap in the same way that O'douls is beer.

How much mercy do you guys think Captain Insano shows? Probably some, right?

….You rrrrraaaaaaannnnnggggg?

So….Macklemore over Yeezus for Best Rap Album is the new Jethro Tull over Metallica, right?

Remember when Brendan Fraser was a movie star?

"Oh my god that's Abu Nazir! He's my fav!"

I didn't watch The Sopranos until last year and, because I don't live under a rock, I knew what was coming in the final scene. When it finally came, I thought it was brilliant, but I always felt like I was cheated by not having the opportunity to experience that in real time and wonder how the shock would have…