Not the volcano costume AGAIN I hope…

And what about that incorrigible bigot Bejamin "squints eyes suspiciously from behind counter as black youths enter convenience store" Franklin?

If only Mike Myers weren't real. Did you happen to catch The Love Guru?

Hayleigh calls me "other daddy".

John Wayne Gacy or McDonald's snack wrap.

That image of the two kids
is the scariest thing I've seen this Haloween. Who knew nature princesses of ambiguous ethnic origin made little Michael Myers feel so stabby?

Where do you find this shit?

Chris Hemsworth?
To paraphrase Bellona, "I'm not familiar with that person's work". I figured Alexander Skarsgard was a lock for this part.

You sendin' the Lopez?

Go for it. They'll probably just transfer you to a different diocese.

I know the review was pretty harsh, but still…when I hear "painstakingly removing her pubic hair with wax" I get all cautiously optimistic.

"Oh mom, I wish you weren't so slippery when wet."

Secure that shit Hudson!

Hey, leave that baby alone, he just got sued!

Noooo! New Jersey is a peaceful planet! We have no weapons, you can't possibly…

If you can find an old nazi uniform at one of those army-navy stores, you could go as Glen Beck (or as Obama, depending on your political sensibilities/grasp of reality).

I'll just wait for the release of Les Stroud Harmonica Hero, thank you very much.

Hooker's a good cop!

IT'S NOT HIS FAULT!

You can imagine how the producers felt when they finally saw the trailer. Based on Fiddy's pitch, they thought they were financing a movie called "Before I Sell 'dis Truck."