Yeah, you should listen to him.

Whoa… is it even possible to post a number less than one in a firstie? Doesn't that reverse the flow of space time or cause the universe to collapse into a singularity or something like that? You're messing with forces you don't understand, dude.

I think it was called wet dream, just.

Greatest profile pic ever, Fart.

If Caruso comes back today (puts on novelty glasses with big nose and thick black moustache) I'm going to have to issue him a cetacean.

I wish I could achieve eternal sunshine of the Sandlerless mind.

You're right - they'd probably stand there giddily filming the action as their buddies got beat down in the street Rodney King style.

A+. You're in fine form today, Dave.

Guy Fieri is cheesvoyant - he can sense when you have a hankering for a hunk of chesse and can predict the future…. of cheese. He can also teleport to and from Wisconsin at will.

Apparently, Hawaii has no records of her filming 50 First Dates there. How do you explain that?

GossipCop
GossipCop would actually be a cool idea if they could actually arrest those smug fucks from TMZ and rough them up a bit back at headquarters.

Guy in a Fieri.

It sucks that I'm dead to Nathan since I don't really give two shits about Mad Magazine anecdotes (especially after all we've been through together - remember that time I commented on that MYOF entry he did? Good times…), but I do love reading about comedy and I'd love to read this book too.

That's what I get for cancelling my "Santogold Fancy" magazine and newsletter subscription 7 months ago. I'm totally out of the Santogold/Santigold loop now.

In the early days of HBO, they only had about 4 movies and they were played on a constant loop. Zorro the Gay Blade was one of them. I couldn't recite every line from memory, but I seem to remember a lot of funny-accent-related humor (something about "ships in the field").

Only the unapologetically douchey man shall pass…. only the unapologetically douchey man shall pass…. only…

SantOgold
with an "o". You're welcome.

There were definitely some cunning stunts in the last Ron Jeremy movie I saw.

Yeah, I know it's a stretch… that's why I tried to kind of backpedal a bit at the end of what said. It was more of a random observation than an accusation.

Manages to get Neilsen to swim in raw sewage. He loves it.