Okay, I haven't actually watched THIS episode yet, but…

I shot a sheriff, once. I was acquitted because the only two witnesses, a mumbly white guy, and a stoned Jamaican man, provided conflicting accounts of how it went down.

It's that Natty Boh… wipes your brain cells.

I heard this stuff was originally supposed to be a Twilight skin-glimmering gel.

The only people who really win in sex lube-based class action lawsuits are the lawyers. Don't get me wrong, I believe that there is a serious epidemic with misrepresented sex lubes in this day-and-age, but there has got to be a better way to show these people that we demand a higher class of sex lube!

I had four Dirty Bananas at Seacrets once. Easily one of the worst diarrhea episodes in my life.

That's why Call of Duty got so stale: if you weren't crashing inside a helicopter, you were trying to avoid a crashing helicopter. Eventually, they just ran out of things to do with exploding helicopters.

At the time, I thought the crux of the joke was just about him struggling to pronounce a Mexican word with his thick Rhode Island accent.