@Donald: The Last Great Wilderness, is his first film. I really like all of his films so far, and agree, Young Adam is a very good film. Certainly, in terms of a Scottish film industry, he's the best we've got until Lynne Ramsay starts making features again. I just feel like he's building up to something really,…

Piers Morgan.
David Cameron.
Margaret Thatcher. In fact, I'd rather push Thatcher's wheelchair to the top of a tall mineshaft and tip her over the edge by way of poetic justice.

No, only mild references to petering at most. And no condiments allowed within a 50-yard radius.

David Mackenzie?
Really? I'd seen posters and promo pics for this and just assumed because of Kutcher that it'd be a standard rom-com. But Mackenzie's got an eye for the kinky and otherwise sexually transgressive - the next biggest shock, after seeing his name, was to discover it's rated PG-13 - so even if it does…

@Claude - yeah, the extended DVD version has the cocaine line (along with, I think, the only unbleeped swears in the whole series), the shorter DVD version sticks with candy.

Man, that line works so much better in the pilot that aired on TV rather than the extended DVD version - it's much funnier when he tries to cover his tracks in a kid-friendly manner: 'tricks are what a hooker does for money', [realises kids are watching], 'or candy!'

"You're the reason I'm walking, Evil! YOU'RE THE REASON!"
I had this recorded on my DVR for months and couldn't bring myself to watch past the opening sequence in the orphanage, because I was afraid the rest of the film couldn't possibly live up to its delirious, self-deluded crappiness. Sweet mother o' mercy was I…

Yeah, The Apartment's always my default choice when anyone asks me to name my favourite film. Not that it absolutely, definitely is, but it's always the one that springs to mind as being absolutely perfect.

Wedding dance
I had a similar reaction to that wedding video, Noel, but rather than get choked up it left me with a big goofy grin on my face. Putting all snark and cynicism aside, it was goddamn adorable. I'm especially a sucker for the kind of choreography you might expect from a classic musical done in that kind of…

Style
Style over substance, yeah, but what style - it's like playing a Michel Gondry video.

Skins has been insufferable since the word go, and Shameless long descended into self-parodying caricature (pretty much around the time James McAvoy and Ann-Marie Duff left). Psychoville's been surprisingly good (I say surprisingly only because I never expected it to live up to the standards of The League Of…

Lobey Dosser

There was a stage production of The Wasp Factory a couple of years back, but I didn't get to see it. Don't know how it would ever work, but if someone could find a way (and the money) to adapt The Bridge properly it could be spectacular.

Seconded. I meant to say something about that above, actually. One of my favourite books, done right by. The entire thing's pretty perfectly cast, actually - nobody could have made a better Kenneth than Bill Paterson.

Any interaction between Malcolm and Julius Nicholson 'the big baldy bawbag' is invariably a high point for me.

There's a Scottish underwear line called Bawbags, which, in the singular, is my own preferred term of abuse.

Seconded on all of the above. The Thick Of It is undoubtedly the best British TV of the decade, and Capaldi's a massive part of that success. It was actually jarring to see him appear in Getting On last week and not enter a room shouting 'awrite cunt-chops!' or similar.

I'm really sorry, you won't be hearing any more swearing from us you MASSIVE GAY SHITE. FUCK OFF!

Eff-star-star-cunt.

He just keeps himself going with the occasional Toblerone binge.