It may just be because I feel really good this week - the woman from the 3 some texted me, we talked a bit about what we liked/didn't like, and she thanked me for making her feel so special - but I've already managed to hit on you, MLA, almost LizLemon, and I think someone else in another thread today. That's…

Well, glad things are still going somewhere with the crush, and hope you got to enjoyed at least something.

Your friend might be on to something, even if too extreme, but I must insist that if you go bang 50 women you take plenty of pictures. We already missed out on seeing a hot lesbian 4some once in this comment section.

Still need some more practice? That nurse movie is still on OnDemand, and I've got some time this weekend…

There are too many jokes to make here about FUI offenses and license suspension, needing a special license for heavy models, the importance of a vision test and pulling someone's license at a certain age, and testing how close someone can pull in parallel between two other people that I don't know where to start.

Is that a real gay term? I'm only familiar with unicorn in the context of single woman who will have sex with a m/f couple without being problematic about it somehow. I learn so much here.

Found it. If you're ever curious this is an example of me using my powers for obvious good: http://www.avclub.com/tvclu… . It starts within the first 50, maybe 20 comments. I'm very proud of that one, because I got to boil it down to "Your opinion is objectively wrong." Apparently I even got a fan note later at…

I've never been an actor or theater type, but I had some friends in theater groups in college and went to some of their parties. Their parties were some of the most notorious nights of debauchery in the school year for good reason.

You raise a good point. I think italian vampires still hate garlic, but if he seems to really enjoy your garlic smothered junk too much, then drive the stake through his heart anyway, as I'm pretty sure that'll kill a goddam eye-tie too.

The third funniest thing I've said in my life to a woman in bed was when we were both 19 or 20 and I wasn't particularly enjoying what we were doing, and I sighed and asked her "So, are you bored yet?"

Same reasons men having sex with their hand cheat? Orgasms are good, but many people want some sort of interpersonal connection with them, either briefly or long term.

Try applying loads of garlic to your genitals next time, and see if he's repulsed by it. If so, he's a vampire, and you should immediately drive a wooden stake through his heart.

That last part made me smile, as many of the women I've been with are surprised that skinny nerdy guy just did that. Someone actually compared me to Al Pacino a day or 2 ago, I think in an insulting way, when I said I was 5'7" and 135 lbs, but if anyone knows his little monologue from The Devil's Advocate about "that…

And, dammit, looking back on it, I missed a good opportunity to make a joke pass at someone by mentioning my horse-like qualities.

I didn't even realize that would be coming up. It would probably be worth pointing out to any lonely AVClubbers out there that February 13th is on a Friday this year, and probably the best day in a long time for casual hook ups among single people. Been in that same early February start situation, I think I got her…

No, that came up at one point while we were talking about this, and I was very clear that it was well over my line. Not that there's anything wrong with that. It's just not my thing.

That hadn't occurred to me. I was just really excited to share (that's what she said) and know what time they post. I think that's actually only the 2nd time I ever had the first comment on an AVClub article, and I'm now inordinately proud to have a legitimate firstie.

I know what you're talking about, and I'm really not an inherently bad person, just can be kind of a dick, mostly in an Andy Kaufman-esque way where I'm just concerned my jokes make me laugh, and won't back down from a logical argument once I get going. You probably would have enjoyed my previous discussion like that…

I'm picturing an unhappy woman telling a guilt ridden man "It doesn't count, we were in different area codes" and I'm sorry but I can't help chuckling a little.

I think Schism is still on the list of sins of automatic excommunication latae sententae from the catholic church, but I'm not sure it counts if you were never a member, so if it's any comfort you're still halfway there?