And his siblings Swiss and Rye.

Ahab and Moby would be great twins.

François?

Naming your child Kylo Ren is only acceptable if he has a twin named Kylo Stimpy.

This is not the country that was described to me in fourth-grade social studies.

Have you seen Marathon Man?

Why reward a troll with a delicious cake? Unless if course, it's poisoned… or laced with Ex-Lax… or actual feces. Or has a cleverly disguised layer of cockroaches. Or contains minced body parts of the troll's family members. There are lots of possibilities.

Liederhosen? Singing pants?

He's not even an officer.

I didn't get that far in the review, or I'd have questioned that too. There's something to be said for "Write what you know."

In that case, why not keep the column alive? An explanation would be nice.

Exactly.

…and his commanding officer, sharpshooting Sergeant Matthews….

Depends on what kind of revolution.

Trump's just plain treasonous against the tenants of U.S. democracy.

….signifying nothing.

"When they go low, we go high"?

If over a third of Americans approve of Trump at this point, that's nothing to celebrate.

You don't have to initiate. The world needs catchers too.

Open the internment camps, purge congress, abolish the constitution.