I too, store my 80s Datsuns in a shelter.

It’s fast because it’s got that great big turbo in there.

He gnawed off the GPS anklet again. They thought he was in the garage for 32 straight hours, which is normal.

Who the hell let this happen?! who was supposed to be watching David right now huh? Patrick?!

You are like the dad in one of those 15 kid families. It isn’t that you are actively neglecting your kids (Jeeps), it is just that after a certain number of kids (Jeeps), you can’t possibly provide them the level of attention they need to blossom into healthy, successful, adults (Jeeps).

What kind of monster am I?

Russians make Wile E. Coyote say “That is nuts.”

TLDR;

The 2-door GLS version looked like a cross between an Escort, Thunderbird and Ambien:

My one memory of the Tempo was that a middle/high school friend’s mom had one- I’m not sure if it was the four cylinder or the V6; either way, it WAS a five speed manual. I remember this because my friend’s mom granny shifted the absolute shit out of that car. I don’t think it ever revved past 2,000 rpm once in its…

The Wrangler Dragon Edition, it comes to us from an alternate universe where Bruce Lee never existed and Burt Reynolds took his place.

Oh boy. I wish I saw this last week.

That just gave me a really bad idea for a go-kart.

Let the record state that the Pacer didn’t sit in a field for an entire presidential term.

It was six presidential terms.

Also known as “Chicago Green Light”.

I think we found the murder weapon.

Cosby Show looks like.

I think a better headline would be:

I don’t give a shit if she’s undead as long as she can hold a work light steady.

So next contender is David Tracy hooning his rusty Jeep on the Nurburgring.