I had an assistant who thought she was being “helpful” by booking our seats all together. I asked her if she would want to sit with me on a plane — it never happened again.

Do you have young children? This is every parent’s dream - mothers and fathers, some of us are just honest about it.

Exactly. Travel for depositions is the worst, it’s either a tiny conference room with no ventilation and a rickety copy machine or huge room with million dollar views and snotty baby lawyers that don’t know how to work the copy machine. 

The Superbowl was in January my entire youth, it’s hard to make the mental switch.

Dirty little secret of divorce, when I travel my ex takes the kids so I enjoy the freedom without the resentment backlash. But the kids they kids are frequently returned to me over-tired, over-sugared, barely bathed, and with a giant pile of laundry and “school stuff.”

Every veteran I know hates that patronizing crap and generally doesn’t participate in “being recognized.” Full fund the VA, hire a veteran, provide of homeless veterans, etc. This is how you show respect. Clapping for veterans is almost as pointless as clapping for the flag.

Ugh - “That is a fair point, we need to define both ends of the list.” 

That is a fair point, we need a to define both ends of the list.

We’re moving Pratt from the canon of Chris’s now, right?

Patti Labelle’s skin!!!!!! Glowing, flawless, and she’s an absolute delight.  My step-mother’s name is Priscilla, and it’s fitting.

But the worst sext I’ve received, multiple times from different men on dating sites is “show me your tits.” Not creative, not sexy, and all for him. Ugh.

I assume this is satire. Right? .... Right? 

Yes! Kids’ friends are First Name - Jenn Smith; Last Name - Kim’s mom. Also makes it easy to search for all the moms/dads for my lazy birthday party invite group text.

Agree. Everyone is in my phone by their full name — if I know it. My son thinks I’m crazy to list my parents by their full names. My contacts loaded onto my phone years and years ago from my work contacts, which include full names and mailing addresses for my relatives, so the default is a person’s full name.

I read that too fast and thought the David Byrne silenced the dudes! 

“Ivanka’s mere presence in the White House lends white women voters a kind of a womanly self-righteousness that willfully blinds them to all the fucked up things that the Trump admin is doing to women. By “supporting” her so effortlessly, i.e. buying her book, praising her outfits, and…

Eshakti is the BEST!! 

I recommend Friends from College on Netflix for a great grown-up Fred Savage performance. Bonus, for those who like me were the same age as Kevin Arnold during Wonder Years, you’re the same age now as Savage (and his friends) in the series. 

My go to home alone meal all summer was a lovely caprese salad with a hunk of fresh bread. 

It’s worth it. It’s only awkward the first time. I’ve had 3 kids, my modesty left a long time ago.  Getting a brazilian wax is one of the few things that can make be feel young, sexy, and desirable.  I realize it’s some weird patriarchy internalized messaging, but I don’t care. It feels sensual afterwards and gives my…