I know very little about Fifth Harmony, besides that some of their songs are ones I would play to dance around the house by myself to and Work From Home is terrible, but I feel like trying to embark on a solo career is risky. You could either be the Justin Timberlake of your group and have a successful career, or you…

Did he just compare himself positively... to Hitler? And he is friends with Donald Trump, our President-elect? I don’t want to live on this planet anymore.

That Property Brothers proposal sounds like it was ripped right out of Pinterest... and my nightmares.

Trump has a Nixonian belief that laws don’t apply to the President and will probably use that argument through his lawyers once he gets in office. This whole thing gets worse by the day.

Raccoons have the cutest faces so it is really hard not to want to feed them, but I also hate rabies and raccoons tipping over trash cans. I live in Boston and a raccoon sat on the front stoop to my building once and just stared me down when I tried to go inside- they can be major assholes.

I would rather almost any other song but Love Yourself by Justin Bieber win song of the year. I hate the entire concept of that song- it’s the I’m totally over you, but not really because I am writing an entire song about you song. The award should of course go to Formation, but I will settle for anything but Love…

I am super excited about this. I loved Shrill and when I met Lindy at a book event she was incredibly kind and lovely to me even though I acted like a total crazy nerd. It was also the best book event I have ever been to.

That Tom Ford interview is insane. I feel like famous people who say in interviews they think about everything dying are trying (and failing) to seem like really deep people. I call it the Lana Del Ray method. Also, there is no such thing as tacky clothes on children. Children will run around in the weirdest stuff if…

I watched it last year to see the absurd styles and to follow up on the live-tweeting, but since you can already see all of the pictures of the bizarre outfits online, I figure why bother. I think people who are Kardashian/Jenner and I guess Hadid sister super fans probably watch it now?

I still wear a Victoria’s Secret bra, but I can only fit in one style without half my boob falling out no matter what size I try on (due to the cut, padding placement). I can never find a 32DDD (or anything above a D) in department stores and buying online somewhere and finding that they fit weird and going through…

I would say about as awkward as your mom posting a picture of you and your sister naked with angel wings as children on twitter to celebrate you walking on said catwalk.

I just associate “Papa” with a grandfather instead of seeing it as a young fresh term. Or else I picture Papa Smurf.

Finally someone who agrees with me! My parents have an open floor plan and I hate it. I don’t understand why people wouldn’t want separate spaces for separate activities.

Oh my goodness, I’d forgotten about McAlister’s when trying to erase the memories of my year in Mississippi from my brain. Now I really want a french dip and sweet tea.

I have Comcast for mostly basic cable and internet. Internet only was like 80 bucks a month back when I did that, but then I missed a lot of my tv shows and let’s face it, a lot of the stuff available on Amazon Prime is shit and Netflix doesn’t have new seasons, and even at a relatively young 28 I don’t even know…

I hate to be the person who defends Bieber because he seems genuinely awful most of the time, but I would feel tempted to punch a stranger who just came up and touched me without permission. Just because you’re famous doesn’t mean your fans get to have an all-access pass to grab you whenever they want.

I keep seeing her tops at the TJ Maxx near my place. It feels good.

Yes! I was just saying something similar to my sister about being recently sober vs. longer term recovery- where at the beginning you see alcohol everywhere, think everyone else is drinking all the time and think everyone who drinks has a problem and then you get further into recovery and realize, oh wait, no, it’s…

All the stars for you, you said exactly what I was thinking about both situations but way more articulately than my rage smashing the keyboard could ever hope to accomplish.

Yeah, I think anyone following the Kardashians on social media could have also seen that the bodyguard was accompanying the other sisters, who were out for the night, and combined that with knowing the location of the apartment via social media analysis. This doesn’t seem like an inside job, more Bling Ring-level…