Um, I am proposing marriage to the pitcher. I can get him and the puppy. I know someone said that before, but yeah. Me want.

I can't even deal with the little kitten puddle. There are so many snuggles that need administering that I can't stand it. Someone get me a kitten, I already baby my neighbor's cat, which they may not like if they knew.

I was a babysitter, but I made 3 dollars an hour and even when I watched the kids for 9 hourse I was still underpaid. That probably speaks more to the family I worked for than anything else. I started when I was 14 and they said they would pay me about $6.00 dollars an hour. I stopped when I was 16 because they…

Here's what my parents did when I was a tween in the summer, went to work and left me to my own devices, which were usually watching tv, reading, and swimming in the pond near my house. If you have the money to send them to camp, do it. God knows I always wanted to go. I also think most kids think they know everything…

As Oprah said, your vajajay is like a self-cleaning oven, you don't need special wash. Plus "noonoo" and "Froo Froo"? Those sound worse than the "scary" word vagina. I'll continue to call it my vagina like an adult, thanks.

Indeed, I want them to be my best friends. I met Anderson Cooper once, in New Orleans, I have my picture taken with him and it was like 9 million degrees and I look like crap but he looked sweatless and amazing. How is he so awesome?

They spent more on the horse than I have made in the last 3 years. Can I share the stable with him? It would probably be nicer than my apartment, my bedroom is a little smaller than the average horse pen. There is no horse poop in my apartment though, so that is a plus. I actually can't be mad at the Romney's about…

Well it makes sense that Adam Carolla doesn't think women are funny because based on what he says, he doesn't understand humor. The guy is not funny at all. Also, does anyone else think Chelsea Peretti is super hilarious? She appears on World's Dumbest on trutv, which is my guilty pleasure show.

My mom smoked while pregnant with my sister and me and I like to tell people that that is why I have a big toe that curls upward no matter how hard I try to make it stay flat and fingers that I can almost bend to the back of my hand. That may have been because she was a small woman carrying twins though. Eh, I will…

This is pretty much the dumbest thing I've ever heard. Let her swim topless, it causes her pain to swim with a top on because she had cancer and a masectomy. Of course, I am in favor of letting anyone swim in whatever they want. Newsflash, boobs or lack thereof will not scare your kid (which you know tends to be the…

um, they frisked someone who had been nude seconds previously? Do they think she has magic skills that enabled her to move things from her naked body to her clothes in mere seconds?

Can celebrities stop suing each other? They all have millions of dollars anyway. The only legitimate lawsuit I can see in this article is the Massey brothers' lawsuit against Bristol Palin because she seems like a horrible person who would totally do what they said she did.

I think my dog would look at me like I betrayed her little trust and then lick me until I stopped if I tried to paint her nails. She attempts to lick the groomers as her way of asking them not to hurt her, even though they just give her a bath, shave her, and clip her toenails. Kisses are actually her answer to…

Jennifer, run as far away from John Mayer as you can! Only disaster can amount from any relationship with him and he seems like a total jerk.

Guess what, I'm on food stamps, and I also pay rent and have taxes taken out of my paycheck. Screw you, Eric Hovde (and most Republicans) for assuming everyone is trying to cheat the system. Most people on food stamps are like me, people who wouldn't be able to afford to eat anything if not for the food stamps I get…

oops, sorry for going crazy on you, I guess I get drawn in with these shot wars just like everyone else.

I am totally aware of this. I also know that some kids have medical conditions that require them to receive their vaccines at later dates than most children. I think those children (and their parents) should not be judged for following a slightly delayed schedule because of legitimate medical issues that would affect…

Oh god, this is going to start the shots war over again with parents posting that their children need the limited shot regimen because of actual medical reasons and then assuming that people think all parents who do the limited shot regimen are assholes. To stop that before it starts (it won't stop it) I will say, no…

I just saw on [Change.org] that they are taking down the sign because of all the negative attention. One small win against street harassment, although whoever thought the sign was a good idea in the first place is a massive jerk.

Haha, I love both breeds, but I agree with a previous commenter, the Boston looks like he can't deal with the Corgi's cheeriness. Which actually fits in well with us Bostonians, as a matter of fact.