That's beautiful, thanks!!

I'm a terrible person, but I think Jessica Chastain should do everything instead.

You've nailed it!! It's like "Bondage In The Attic" or something. What an awful mom!!

I agree that there's not going to be any benefit from dishing out your truth directly to your mother - she isn't capable of doing anything good with it, from your description.

Jesus, Eunice!! Buy a math class!!

Hijack Chris Christie to drive you!! He'll do anything!!

I'm bothered by the idea of Ron Howard breeding, this explains my discomfort with Bryce Dallas Howard, I guess.

You got no more splainin' to do!!

Which one is Sean?

This just in: The Rolling Stones are going to give a free concert in Cuba. Bring your grandpa and buy cigars!!

I will not forget the rum!!

I love that John Oliver resurrected the "short-fingered vulgarian." I'd forgotten that one.

I finally got yerdad to let me put on "Everest" last night. He went along mostly because he did too may tequila shots with that lumberjack and then I had to drive him home. Anyhoo, adorably, he looks at me and says, "This isn't going to end well, is it?"

Alternating with "Where's Mike Wallace??"

It was the first one I thought of :)

Maybe after this we should have Terrible Sandwich League?

"If you want to worship an orange pile of garbage with a reckless disregard for everything, get on down to arbys & try our loaded curly fries"
@nihilist_arbys

That depends on if it's working!!
[no]

Thank you, le mug!!

Your Moby Dicking was beautiful!!