“Make sure they know that we’re kind of homeless and can’t fulfill our orders. That’ll be the hook.”

It must be very cool to think that your interests are the only interests

uhh are blake shelton and gwen stefani paying ppl to post about their relationship

She is a gossip hound and a bitch, and she says stuff that’s 100% inappropriate. For example, there is a husband-wife couple that works here in the same building. Wife is pregnant. Busy-body told her that she “enjoys thinking of [wife] and [husband] making babies together.”

Also that is a stone cold bitch of a coworker.

I feel you, Jenny Slate. When I had a bad spate of migraines a few months ago, I barfed a lot at work and the office busy-body told everyone I was pregnant, then when I stopped barfing and was sad for a week because it was Mother’s Day and I missed my mom, the office busy-body told everyone that I miscarried.

HOW DO YOU HAVE TIME TO POST ARTICLES LIKE THIS, I MEAN:

Florence’s song goes, “and it’s hard to dance with a devil on your back, so shake him off.”

Uh, hospice means “end of life care”. She will not be recovering.

The Florence song is “Shake It Out.” Despite the lyrics. “Shake It Off” is T Swift.

Never underestimate a jezebel commenters ability to find something negative in an otherwise heartwarming story

You’ve got it backwards. Shake It Off is Taylor Swift.

I don’t think it was in bad taste at all and I lost quite a few family members to the Holocaust. A lot of Jews hear the same rhetoric from Trump that our forebears heard from Hitler and it scares the shit out of us.

*sounds of Bob Belcher GROANING*

Okay can we talk about xoJane lately?? The other day I read the one from the woman who says that she thinks straight men just become gynecologists to grope women and I just

The shrimp were so big.

I really liked him on Buffy! I should re-watch buffy. WHO WANTS TO WATCH BUFFY WITH ME?!

I mean, this isn’t the first time Pete Campbell’s baby mama kept her pregnancy and delivery a secret.

I’M FROM SEATTLE. I KNOW THE WORDS BUT THAT DOESN’T ACTUALLY MAKE THE USAGE *ANY* BETTER. THE COMPARISON STANDS.

THIS IS LIKE WHEN RYAN COMPARED BLAKE LIVELY TO BEYONCE. SOMEBODY GO CHECK THE WATER AT THE REYNOLDS HOUSEHOLD BECAUSE THESE FOOLS ARE TRIPPIN.