The fact that he took a day off work to go out with her after one date freaked me out.

But if there is time travel involved? I mean, if you're flung to a time when your spouse won't even be born for a few decades, with no reasonable expectation to return to your own time*, you can consider yourself available.

A friend was telling me a similar perfect-guy story (not missed connections but otherwise) and when she got to the "but—" part, I said, "He's married, right?"

God, I fucking hate that song so much. Every time I have to play it (Oldies jock) I remind people there's NO WAY it'd be a hit today because - CHEATER - FUCKING ASSHOLE CHEATER. I leave out the profanity on-air. I need this gig.

"I know I'm not supposed to say this already, but I'm so ready to settle down. I just need the right girl."

My alarm bells went off way before the lie, so much so that the lie was a relief. He was only a husband chumming for sidepiece? Whew. Because he was sending all the signals of an obsessed Women Owe Me stalker nutjob.

"I'm ready to settle down" within what sounds like the first half hour of the date? No. Absolutely not. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. Get your ass home.

No. It's creepy to want to use a car trip as currency for a transactional blowjob though.

Right, if you're not creep, maybe just say "I really want to get head in a car, if any women have similar fantasies, get in touch." It's the exchange that suggests you're a creep more than anything.

A blowjob? Eh, if I'm going Montreal to Toronto I'd rather just take Air Canada and feel like I'd been properly fucked.

I'm not a creep, by the way.

On modern vacuum cleaners, suction is adjustable.

I literally could not give a fuck about yours or any other white person's feelings. You are a terrible fucking person.

I'm not often left speechless, but I am blown away by this comment. Thank you so, so much.

Nearly all of my friends are middle to upper middle-class, professional, progressive people, so you may have a point. My husband is white, and he is from a shitty, shitastic area. He is not like this. His friends that are from a similar background aren't like this. You could call them out if they said something…

True. But at least we can spell!

I am obviously not at ALL in favor of anything he did, and there's a certain scumminess to his apology, but in light of all of this Cosby bullshittery/questioning who's really the victim/denial extreme, it's almost a relief to see a guy actually admit what he did. It doesn't atone for his deeds and it's nothing that…

There's nothing well-intended about #AllLivesMatter. Don't buy that bullshit. It's the classic deliberate misunderstanding of something the user doesn't want to get. It's right up there with "When is White History Month?"

Good lord, you must not have been married long. Good natured torturing of one's spouse is basically the most fun thing about having one!

He does! After seeing the movie he still came to my friend's party the same night and watched me tell jokes.