Jetsiest thing ever

What a twist!

On planet sarcasm

I had Marshall in my fantasy team. He fucking sucked.

Undead?

o7

I’ll see you in the zombie apocalypse, I guess. Sans firewood.

Not experiencing the primal thrill of breaking objects in two is grounds for dismissal.

Man card revoked, nerd. Go inside and play cards or something...

My dick is so hard for you

Who need an ice breaker when we’ve got global warming?

MIC DROP

Brilliant, thank you!

Nope.

Sorry I’m very confused: how is romo’s contract not the next guys’ problem?

Highlight of dudes life was getting told to S A D by an nBa pro. Loser!

It’s because she’s white.

Well, certain segments of the population.

Party of small gubmint, amirit?

The best jokes need an explanation